A Secret
by What About Love
Summary: Can she really keep it a secret or will everyone around her make it impossible? Can she trust him to keep it as well? Will/Karen
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:** The first chapter is the only chapter in which such an event occurs, so don't let it put you off from reading the rest of the story. I have never written a story of this nature, but I wanted to challenge myself as a writer. I'm a little nervous about the response I may receive. I hope you enjoy.

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Karen had returned home from Will's birthday party at a little bit after midnight. The evening hadn't been too perfect for him, but after she stopped grieving for Stan's missed birthdays then she became lighter. The truth was, she never appreciated her husband until he had died, leaving her hundreds of millions of dollars.

She did apologize to Will, though, when nobody was listening. She had spent his birthday party making comments about Stan and how much she missed him. Jack didn't pay any attention to Will either and she could tell that it really got on his nerves. He told her that her apology was appreciated and they ended it all with an embrace. She even told him that she would be free to talk if he needed it, anytime. Obviously she was feeling very generous that evening.

She loved her friends. She loved her life and she wouldn't have changed anything, not even her childhood because it made her that much stronger. Her reflection looked back at her in her full-length mirror and she smiled to herself, running her hands over her waist. Weight had always been an issue with her and she was finally at what she called her happy weight. Everything in her life seemed perfect, except for the fact that she was lonely.

With Stan's death had come the whirlwind of dating and looking for the right person to spend the rest of her life with. She thought that she had found it with Lyle, but no such luck. However, she had been using her alone time to get closer to her friends. She had always been very close with Jack and Grace, but she was learning so many things about Will that she never imagined she would. He was actually a really nice guy, once she looked past the slight arrogance that he tended put across. They could actually have intelligent conversations together, which she could never find with Jack or Grace. There was something about him that just made him easier to talk to.

She took her shoes off and laid a pair of pajamas out on her bed to change. She was running her fingers through her curly hair to loosen the hairspray when there was a loud noise from downstairs. Her head snapped towards the door of her bedroom and she furrowed her brow. She opened her door and looked down the long, dark hallway.

"Rosie?" Her whisper ricocheted off of the walls, but was quickly lost in the silence of the penthouse. She nervously bit her bottom lip before stepping out into the hallway, the wooden floor feeling surprisingly cold on her bare feet. "Hello?"

Her legs shook beneath her as she peaked over the railing of her stairway. After what she thought was a thorough investigation of the manse, she returned to her bedroom and tossed the door closed behind her. She chastised herself for being so paranoid and took down the zipper of her tight black dress. All of a sudden she felt the coldness of metal pressing into her spine and a hand clasping her mouth, muffling her high-pitched scream.

"Shut up or I'll kill you." A man whispered in a deep New Yorker accent. She panicked, but didn't say a word as his lips left her ear. Her breathing was heavy and she prayed that he would just get her jewelry, or whatever he wanted, and leave. She had never been so afraid.

He took his arm from behind her back and wrapped it around her waist, his gun sliding along her stomach. He could feel her shaking and he smiled to himself as he moved over and pushed her to the floor. She landed on her stomach, painfully crushing her breasts in the fall, but she still didn't move. She heard him ruffling through her dresser drawers, looking for only he knew what, before he found her jewelry box.

Karen Walker wasn't an idiot by any means. All of her good jewelry was stashed away in the bank and the jewels he was taking weren't very valuable. She continued to lie on her stomach on the cream colored carpet of her bedroom, shivering and desperately awaiting for her intruder to take his leave.

He sat his bag of stolen items down next to the door and walked back over to her small form on the floor. He knelt down by her and gently took her earrings out of her ears before removing the rings from her fingers and her bracelet, revealing a peculiar tattoo on his thumb. She was stunned at how gentle he was with her, but she was soon taken by surprise when he ripped her pearls from her neck. She coughed and brought her hand to the pain in her throat that he had just caused. He placed the gun to the back of her head and she stopped moving.

His hand rubbed the back of her neck in a sickening manner before he slowly caressed her bare back through her unzipped dress. She shivered at his touch and silently begged for him to stop, to leave her alone. He ran his hand over her buttocks and down to the back of her knee before bringing it under the fabric of her dress. When his hand touched her bare inner thigh she couldn't take it anymore. She reached to his hand to remove it from her skin and began to squirm. "Get your fucking hands off of me."

He turned her over on her back in a forceful motion and she finally saw his face, his gray eyes. The gun was thrust into her temple and a tear fell down her cheek. His hand was at the base of her throat and his face was close to hers. She could smell alcohol on his breath.

"Shut up, Karen." Her heart seemed to drop at the use of her name. How did he know her name? "I'm going to tell you how this is going to work. You're going to shut up and lay there and I'm going to fuck your brains out. Then I'm going to leave and you'll never tell anyone about me." She shook uncontrollably, a sob getting caught in her throat. "If you scream, I'll kill you. If you try to get away from me, I'll kill you. If you bite me, kick me, slap me, I'll kill you."

He leaned down and placed a cold kiss to her lower lip before setting the gun down on the bedside table next to him. He was unarmed, but could reach the gun at a moments notice and that was what frightened her the most. He placed his hands on her shoulders, baring them to him by pulling her dress down her arms. She bit her lip and cried harder when he exposed her bra clad chest. Her eyes were closed and she tried to push her mind to a different place in time, a place where she was happy.

She was taken out of her search for a better place when he stopped looking at her and placed his lips on her cleavage. As a reflex she tried to push him away, but he lifted her wrists over her head and pinned them to the ground. He took his other hand and slid it up her thigh before ripping her thong from her body. She jumped at the slight pain and the idea of becoming barer in front of him. Tears were flowing from her eyes like waterfalls, but he ignored it and used his free hand to push down his pants. He placed himself in between her legs and prepared to make his entrance.

She began to push him and yell for help, throwing all of his threats aside. She just couldn't lie there and allow him to do that to her. She got her wrists free and tried to hurt him, scratching at his face and neck. He was taken by surprise, but quickly fought back. He grabbed the gun off of the table and thrust it under her chin while he pulled her hair towards the floor.

Her breath was heavy and she was sobbing hysterically, unable to think straight as he hurriedly shoved himself into her center. She whimpered as he pulled out and thrust into her again. It was painful and fast, too fast.

It lasted a long time and once he was finally finished she was sure that she would never be able to walk again. She felt weak and sick to her stomach by the time he pulled out of her body. She could feel herself bleeding from his rough entrances and bruises were forming on her wrists.

"I'll never forget this, Karen." He kissed her lips and looked straight into her half-open eyes. She suddenly spat in his face, making him pull away from her. He angrily wrapped a hand around her throat and added pressure. She grabbed his wrist and tried to pull him away, but he tightened his grip. Karen's eyes closed and the world for her turned black, silent.

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It was around two o' clock in the morning and Will was standing on Karen's doorstep. Their conversation after his party, her apology and their agreement that he could come to her if he needed anything; it was all replaying in his head. Before he knew it he was hailing a cab and on his way to see her. She did say that he could come to her day or night.

He tried to call her, to text message her as well, but she never replied. He knocked on the front door and awaited an answer. He hoped that she wouldn't be angry with him for coming over so late, but he needed to talk to her. He had broken up with Vince after he had been given his apartment key. Grace didn't understand, and she yelled at him. He knew that Karen would have the depth to understand and maybe give some solid advice. He desperately needed some help.

After a few more knocks on the door he decided to try the knob. He was very surprised to find it unlocked and he opened the door to walk inside. When he called her name and received no answer he decided to try her bedroom, only hoping that she wouldn't yell at him. He opened the door and whispered her name.

"Karen, are you in here?" He closed the door behind him and walked towards the bed. His eyes widened and he felt panic jam in his throat when he saw her lying on the floor. Her clothes were half-off of her body and she had been bleeding on the cream colored carpet beneath her. He rushed to her side and shook her. "Karen, wake up, please." He checked her pulse and breathing, she was at least alive. Suddenly her eyes fluttered open and stared straight into his, she seemed hollow. It was when she began to cry that he sighed, reaching for his phone to call an ambulance. When he began to speak into the phone she quickly reached up and grabbed it from his hands, throwing it across the room.

"Go away." She sobbed as she covered her face with her hands, unaware of how exposed she really was.

"Karen, what happened?" Without warning she tried to sit up, wincing at the pain that it caused her. He gave her a worried, questioning look, and she grabbed his hand.

"I'm going to be sick, Will." He hurriedly lifted her into his arms and rushed her to her bathroom. They barely made it in time as she reached for the toilet and vomited, her eyes still stinging with tears. She leaned her head forward when she was finished and sighed. Her dress that was still around her waist began to fall and reveal her soft hips. Will held it up and zipped it enough so that it wouldn't fall.

"Karen…"

"Go away." Her demand was full of pain and he knew that he couldn't leave, it wasn't an option.

"I'm taking you to the hospital." He reached for her, but she slapped him away. "Karen, you look like hell. We need to get you to the hospital."

"No!" Her scream was loud and her tears became fuller. She doubled over and hit the ground with both of her hands. Her behavior frightened him, but he was already drawing conclusions in his mind as to what had happened. He stood from his place on the floor and hurried to the phone. "No, don't call. Damn it, I don't need it." She controlled her crying and tried to stand while he grabbed her pajama shirt from her bed.

"Either we find another mean of getting to the hospital or I'm calling an ambulance. No matter what, I'm taking you." He walked over to her and pulled the shirt over her head, covering her skin from his sight. She sniffled and hugged herself close, feeling the warmth of the shirt.

"I have to change."


	2. Chapter 2

The limo pulled up to the hospital and Will wrapped his arm around Karen's shoulder as they entered the building. Within moments they were taken to an examining room and Karen's doctor took a few tests to make sure that she was alright. She wouldn't let Will leave her side, and he held her hand the whole time.

When they were finally allowed to leave it was four o' clock and they were exhausted. He helped her into the limo and Driver began taking them to Will and Grace's apartment. Karen huddled close to herself, feeling ashamed of what had happened. She was also ashamed that Will had seen her in such a light.

"You shouldn't stay at the manse." Will's whisper seemed ignored for a moment until he felt Karen's hand grasp his in the dark of the car. She didn't look at him. "You can stay with me for a while. I'm sure Grace will understand."

"No." Her eyes met his in a chilling motion and he felt his heart rate begin to quicken. "Honey, this is going to be our little secret. Nobody is going to know."

"Are you going home?"

"I'll pack a suitcase later." She looked at him and tears filled her eyes again. She angrily wiped them away and finished her statement. "I'll be fine on your couch, honey."

He scooted closer to her and she jumped. He looked into her eyes, telling her that it was going to be okay. She licked her lips and sighed. He was caught off guard when she moved into his arms and hugged him, feeling his warmth and the safety of his arms around her. Her tears fell for the millionth time that night, but it was the only time that someone who cared for her was there to catch them.

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Will laid a pillow on the couch in front of the television and went to find a warm blanket while Karen removed her shoes. She was nervous, completely out of sorts, and scared to death. It had only been a few hours since she had been attacked and the harshness of the situation continued to sink deeper into her soul. She felt dirty and wanted to take a shower immediately. She grabbed her purse and began walking to the bathroom at the same time that Will walked into the room with a blanket.

"Where are you going, Kare?" Her arms were wrapped around her upper half and she was slouched more than she usually would be. He could see the pain in her eyes and wished it all on him, softening her burden.

"I was just going to take a shower, honey. Is that okay?" She sounded fragile and he gave her a small smile for comfort.

"Why don't you use my bathroom? It's got a tub. We can put some bubbles in it." She nodded as he held his hand out for her to take. She didn't hesitate and placed her hand in his, allowing him to lead her to his bathroom. He filled the tub with water and bubbles and got her a towel and washcloth. He left the room to get her a pair of his cotton pajamas before returning and turning off the water.

She watched as he catered to her, wanting to help as much as he could. She could tell that he was sleepy, and she appreciated the fact that he hadn't left her side since he found her. He turned to face her, and she didn't wait before she walked into his arms and embraced him. He held her close, and she took in his scent, feeling safe.

"Thank you, honey." He placed a small kiss on the crown of her head and held her for a moment.

"Do you want me to stay awake until you're finished?" She pulled away and gave him an emotionless smile.

"No. You look sleepy, honey. I'll be fine." He nodded and left the room, closing the door behind him and leaving her alone. She sighed before she began to take her clothes off, laying them on the counter. She slowly stepped into the bath and sat down, taking in the scent of the bubbles.

It was the first time that she was alone to think about what had happened only hours before. It replayed in her mind, and she felt sick to her stomach. She didn't even know the man, but he knew her. That was something else that made her cringe; the fact that he used her name. She felt her body trying to relax, but her mind wouldn't allow it. It was racing from thought to thought, fear and anger running through her veins. She hated him. She hated herself for letting it happen. She felt like it was her fault, and she felt so dirty.

She took a deep breath and slid deeper into the bath, her head going under the water. She wanted to feel clean, sanitary. She rose to the surface and wiped the water from her face, breathing heavily. The water didn't help, didn't make her clean. No matter how many times she washed her hair or scrubbed her skin, it wouldn't go away. She wanted Will, she needed a hug from somebody that she knew wouldn't hurt her. Suddenly there was a knock on the door. She jumped and felt her heart beat quicken for no apparent reason.

"Are you okay, Kare? You've been in there for a half hour."

"Yeah, honey." Her response was soft, but she knew that he heard it because he sighed with some kind of relief and walked away. She finally decided to get out of the tub, wrapping herself in a towel and opening the drain. She walked over to get dressed, not even bothering to look at herself in the mirror. She didn't feel like having her reflection mock her.

She had to crack a smile when she picked up the clothes and found a pair of boxers amongst them. She quickly dressed and brushed her hair with Will's brush, hoping that he wouldn't mind. Her wet curls hit her face, feeling cold, and she took a deep breath before cleaning up the bathroom the best that she could. She folded her clothes and left them on the counter. Then she put her contact lenses in her purse before she opened the door and peeked into Will's bedroom. He stood from his bed, where he was reading a book, and walked over to her.

"Is everything alright?"

"I used your brush."

"What?"

"I used your hairbrush. I hope its okay. If not then I'll buy you another one next time I'm out." He smirked at her small ramble and shook his head.

"No. Its fine." She nodded and murmured goodnight as she made her way to his door. He sat down on the bed and watched as she stopped, her hand on the doorknob. She took a deep breath, but she still didn't move. "Karen…" She turned around at the sound of her name. He pulled the covers back on the opposite side of his bed and patted the spot. She bit her lip before slowly making her way over to him.

"Are you sure, honey. I've imposed on you enough tonight."

"First off, you're not imposing at all. And second, I kind of want to hold you." His confession made her heart feel lighter, and the blush on his cheeks let her know how sincere his words were.

She lay down on his bed and he pulled the covers over her. He looked into her hazel eyes as she rolled over on her side to face him. He silently asked her if he could put his arm around her, and she scooted closer, never taking her eyes from his, as he put his arm over her waist. She sighed at the warmth that he brought with him and pulled him closer, placing her face on his chest and breathing him in.

"Don't let go, Will."


	3. Chapter 3

Grace awoke the next morning to a clanking sound in the kitchen. She assumed that it was Will making breakfast, and she excitedly got out of bed to see what they were having. She walked past the couch to find Karen in her kitchen trying to figure out how to turn the stove on. She was in a pair of Will's pajamas, with glasses on and her hair completely frazzled.

"Karen, what are you doing here?" She jumped at the sound of Grace's voice and quickly locked eyes with hers

"Good morning, Gracie. Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah." She walked over and twisted the knob to turn on the stove. Karen nodded in satisfaction and used a fork to place strips of bacon on the pan. "What are you doing here?"

Karen licked her lips and continued with her task, wishing she knew what exactly she was doing. She had no idea how to make bacon and she was having trouble figuring it out with Grace's questions. She knew that Grace would eventually ask her what had happened, but she and Will made an agreement. Neither one of them would speak the truth.

"Well, somebody broke into the manse last night, and I am not going back until somebody finds him."

"Oh, my gosh! Are you okay? What did he take?"

"Honey, stop panicking like that, it makes you look stoned." She flipped a strip of bacon over and silently applauded herself for making the process happen "He just took some of my jewelry. Everything is fine."

Grace took her response at face value and poured herself a bowl of cereal. It wasn't uncommon for her to awaken to Jack walking around in her apartment, but Karen was never there so early She shrugged and sat down at the table, waiting for Will to wake up and hopefully explain the situation a little bit further.

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Will's eyes opened and he came to face the sun, blasting through his window. He felt cold and bare, and he suddenly sat up at the realization that Karen wasn't in sight. He jetted out of bed and burst through his door. He sighed in relief when he saw Karen and Grace making conversation. He had to give her credit that she was hiding everything a lot better than he would be able to.

"Good morning, Ladies." Will walked over to the table and looked to Karen. She smiled and handed him a plate of toast and bacon. "Since when can you cook, Kare?"

"Oh, honey, I can't." She walked back into the kitchen and began to clean up her mess. "I just figured it's the least I can do after you helped me last night. You know, with the police and all." She winked and he got the message that she had already told a particular lie to Grace.

"I told you it wasn't a problem, but thank you." He sat at the table and began to eat. Grace only stared in between them, a confused expression playing with her features.

"What the hell is going on with you two? Karen, why did you call Will last night? I was here too." Karen sat two glasses of orange juice on the table, one for Will and one for Grace.

"He _is_ my lawyer, honey."

"Well, I'm just glad you're okay."

They left the conversation alone. Grace didn't push anything and finished her bowl of cereal. It was after she went to take a shower that Karen finally sat down next to Will at the table, a grapefruit on a plate in front of her. He placed his hand atop hers, and their eyes met.

"How are you really?" His whisper sounded sweet, gentle, and she appreciated the gesture.

"How do you expect me to be, honey?" She took a bite off of her fork and continued to loosen the inside of the fruit.

"Well, most women would be falling apart right now."

"Those women don't have to keep up appearances, honey."

He watched her eat; seemingly unfazed by anything that had happened the night before. He knew that she was a strong woman, no doubt about it, but he also knew that her feelings were deep. He saw examples of that the night before, and he only hoped that she would be able to deal with her current situation in a healthy way. But by the looks of it, he wasn't exactly sure.


	4. Chapter 4

"Karen, you've been living in my pajamas for two days. Why don't we go and pack you a suitcase or something?" She looked over at him from her place on the couch, bottle of gin in hand.

"I don't want to." Her reply was simple, but he couldn't help getting slightly aggravated with her nonchalant manner.

"Well, maybe if you had some clothes then you'd at least leave my apartment."

"Honey, are you saying that you're sick of me?" She tossed the blanket off of her lap and stood, fully facing him. "I can leave if you don't want me here, but you're the one who invited me in the first place."

"No, I don't want you to leave. I just want you to get off your ass." His eyes met hers, and he could tell that his words didn't even break the surface of her exterior. She had been taking pills that he could only imagine what they were, and her eyes were glazed over. "You look like shit. What are you on?"

"Fine, I'll go." She picked up her purse and slipped into a pair of flats that she had worn when she got there. She shrugged and ran her fingers through her hair. "But you have to come with me."

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He couldn't believe that she didn't even care enough to brush her hair before she tried to rush him out the door. He wouldn't take it though; he brought a comb and fixed her hair in the back of the limo. She didn't care, didn't even try to push him away.

They walked to the front door of the mansion, but she suddenly stopped, not wanting to go further. Her hand gripped his and he looked over to find her battling tears. It was an unusual sight, and he wasn't sure how to handle it. She wasn't hysterical like she was the night of her assault, but he could tell that she was freaking out.

She cleared her voice and opened the door, pulling him through it with her. The mansion seemed peaceful, and she could smell the cleaning products lingering in the air. After a moment of looking around the room, she pulled him up the stairs with her. They stopped moving in front of her bedroom door, a place where she never wanted to go again. Will didn't let her panic begin to rise before he opened the door and pulled her into the room. She gasped at the way that he had so roughly moved her body, and she frowned when she looked into her room.

"Will, I don't want to be here." She began to hurry away from the room, but he grasped her hand tighter. "Damn it, Will, let go."

"No." His eyes met hers in a severe motion, stern almost. "We're already here, and you need clothes. Just take a deep breath and do it. You're not a coward."

She nodded and took a deep breath. They walked into the room, and she hurried to her closet, never looking towards her bed, the scene of the pain. She turned on the lights and rushed over to get a couple of suitcases. They were large, and it looked like she was prepared to pack to leave forever. He honestly wouldn't have minded, and she probably wouldn't have either. They both began packing clothes that she would need and shoes as well. She walked through the connecting door to her bathroom and opened her cabinet. Will watched as she opened her large purse and began to fill it with pills and bathroom necessities.

They left the mansion in a quick fashion and loaded her suitcases into the limo. As Driver took them back to Will's apartment, Karen reached into her purse and pulled out a bottle of pills. She took two, without water, and sighed as she leaned her head back against the seat. He watched in silence, fully aware that she did not want to be bothered by his comments about her bad habits. She intertwined their fingers, reassuringly.


	5. Chapter 5

She was so nervous. It was way too soon. They were rushing her. She wasn't ready to leave the apartment. She had agreed to let Will, Grace, and Jack take her to the opening of some new bar downtown. They argued that she hadn't moved from the couch in weeks, which was true. She hadn't left the apartment since Will took her to pack her clothes. She was way to emotional, still, to leave. She also hated the way that Will treated her when she was scared. She was still pissed that he suggested she was a coward. To be fair, he did apologize, but she guessed it was his way of motivation. If there was one thing she definitely needed, it was motivation. But she still didn't want to go to a bar. It was hard enough to lie to Grace about why she wasn't going to work, but she had no excuse not to go out for fun. She felt stuck.

They sat at the bar, Jack bouncing up and down on his stool next to her. She ordered a martini and took a deep breath, Will sensing her uneasiness. He placed his hand on hers and raised his eyebrows in question. She gave him a small, oddly insincere smile, before downing her martini.

"Karebear, come dance with me!" Jack pulled on her hand, forcing her off of her stool.

"Poodle, I don't really feel like dancing." Her words were lost in the loudness of the music. He pulled her close to his body and began to dirty dance with her, bumping their pelvises together. She rolled her eyes and finally complied, running her hands over his buttocks half-heartedly. Dancing was something that didn't sound thrilling anymore. She wanted to go home.

After a couple of hours of dancing and drinking tequila shots, Karen was extremely drunk. She usually knew when to stop, but at that point in time, she didn't want to. She wanted to feel good, alive again. It probably also had something to do with the line of cocaine she had done in the back room. Her legs wobbled as she sat on a stool in between Will and another attractive man.

"How are you, Karen? You look a little drunk." Will placed his hand on her back and moved it in a comforting fashion.

"Oh, honey, of course I'm drunk." She laughed bitterly and did another shot before meeting his eyes. "Why aren't you out there meeting Mr. Right-Now?"

"I don't know. Maybe I'm worried about how you're doing."

"Will, you can't hover over me like I'm your responsibility. You have a life too, so go live it." He patted her back one last time before standing from his stool. His hesitation caused her to turn around and look his way once again. "I'll let you know if I need you, honey. I promise." He smiled and kissed her cheek before making his way onto the dance floor.

"You have yourself a pretty protective friend there." The man on the opposite side of her spoke in a smooth tone. She turned to face him, taking notice for the first time. His eyes were a deep blue, and his dark hair contrasted perfectly with his skin tone. His innocent look reminded her of Jack, and maybe that's why she didn't turn away from a conversation. She was also extremely drunk. She smiled at him in a flirtatious manner.

"He just worries too much, honey. He thinks that someone might take advantage of me."

"Well, maybe I should keep an eye on you too." She laughed at the fact that he was trying his hardest to start an interesting conversation, or rather trying to get into her pants. Either way, she wasn't in the mindset to care.

"Don't be ridiculous. I'm allowed to do who, and what I want. It's my choice." Her words sounded bitter, and she bit her lip to stop herself from being too rude to an apparently sweet man. She turned to fully face him, smiling a little more genuinely to make a silent apology.

"You know, you have a really beautiful smile."

"Thank you, honey."

She had a nice conversation with the man, whose name she never asked. He never asked hers either, and they were soon past the superficialities of a quick meeting at a bar. She knew exactly what he wanted from her, but she wasn't at all ready to give it. She had been living with Will and Grace for two months already, and she was slowly healing. It was especially more difficult to heal since Will made her cut down on the pills she was taking. Still, two months was a decent amount of time to heal.

But what if it was time to move on? Was she just sulking? Not all men were bad; she knew that from her past experiences. She had never been threatened by another man other than the night in her manse. She shook thought from her head as she finished another shot of tequila, her head spinning. She placed her hand on the man's knee, slowly moving it up to his inner thigh. He didn't finish his sentence, and she stood in between his legs. Her face was close to his, and she felt a nervous shiver run down her spine. It felt wrong, but in her drunken state she felt like she had to do it, for some reason or another. She licked her lips and spoke above the sound of the loud music.

"Cut the sweet talk, honey. Are we going to fuck or not?" His eyes widened, but she only bit her bottom lip while awaiting his response. He had never met a woman who was so forward.

"Are you kidding?"

"Are you carrying an STD or anything?"

"No."

"Then I'm not kidding." She took his hand in hers and pulled him from his seat. She led him into the women's bathroom and into a vacant stall, barely large enough for one person. They were lucky that nobody cared about anything in the area of town that they were in because, at the moment, they didn't care either.

She pushed him up against the door of the stall and kissed his lips, dipping her tongue into his mouth. He ran his hands up her backside and cupped her buttocks. She sighed as she felt him beginning to grow hard against her, and she bit his lip. He reached beneath her skirt and pulled her thong down her legs.

She continued to sigh and moan into his mouth as he turned her around and pressed her body into the door. The only problem was; she felt nothing. There were no sparks in her stomach, no butterflies, nothing. However, that didn't stop her from reaching in between them and shoving his pants down his legs. It didn't stop her from grabbing him in her hand, stroking him. She couldn't stop. She was on automatic, overly intoxicated and high, incredibly frustrated with herself.

He lifted her skirt and hoisted her upwards. She felt herself wrap her legs around his waist, and she sighed when he completed their connection. It was when he started moving inside her that _his_ face flashed through her mind; the man who had attacked her. His eyes mockingly looked into hers as the man sucked on her neck and thrust harder. Tears began to fall from her eyes and she shivered in a recollection of fear.

"Stop." Her whisper got caught in her throat, and she knew that he didn't hear her, she didn't hear herself. She didn't do anything to push him away or stall his movements. She was too drunk to think logically and too weak. He ran his hands up the front of her body and pressed her harder into the door. She wrapped her legs tighter around his waist as he caught her lips in a deep kiss.

She could tell that he was getting closer to the edge of his orgasm and desperately wished that it would happen faster. She was finished, never once feeling any pleasure, and she wanted him out of her. She faked her own orgasm, not wanting him to think that he was the problem. She shivered, flexed her lower muscles, and sighed loudly in his ear, biting his earlobe and running her hands through his hair. As she had hoped, the sounds of her supposed climax led him to his own pleasure, and he came inside of her.

Their breathing was heavy, and he tried to stay still for a moment. Karen's thoughts were different. She began to squirm, and he pulled out of her, setting her down on her legs. He pulled his own pants up as she bent over to grab her panties from the floor, keeping them in her hand. The floor was dirty, and she didn't want to put them back on. She tried to open the door, but his hand stopped her.

"Are you crying?" She turned to face him and shrugged. He began to panic and reached to touch her face. "I am so sorry. Did I hurt you?" She slapped him away and wiped the lingering tears from her cheeks.

"Look, honey, you don't have to be nice. We both got what we wanted, so let's get out of here." She tried, once again, to open the door, but he still wouldn't let her. "Damn it let me go."

"What if I want to see you again?" Her laugh was bitter and cold.

"No. I have to leave." She patted his cheek and quickly pulled the door open. Her thighs felt slick against each other, for she didn't take the time to clean up before leaving the bathroom. She tightened her grip on her panties, hiding them from the crowd, as she made her way over to where Will was. He was seated alone at the bar as if he were waiting for her to return. She leaned over and whispered into his ear. "Honey, will you leave with me?" The bartender handed her, her purse and she hurriedly shoved her panties into it.

"Oh my gosh, you look terrible." He reached up to fix her smudged lipstick before text messaging Grace, telling her that he and Karen were tired and leaving. He then stood from his stool and put an arm around her shoulders, leading her out into the street.

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Will and Karen walked down the sidewalk, his arm around her shoulders. He hadn't asked why she wanted to leave so abruptly, but he could tell that she was embarrassed. She even looked a little scared. They hailed a cab, and once they were inside, she turned to him to tell him what was on her mind.

"Honey, I just screwed some guy in the bathroom. I feel so sick."

"What?" His shock was evident on his face, and it caused her to feel even more ashamed. "You can't possibly be ready for sex yet."

"Stop it with the judgment, Will. I feel bad enough already." She sighed and fidgeted in the seat. "I just needed to get out of there."

"Why did you do it, Kare?"

"Are you a therapist now? I can deal with it myself, honey."

"If you can deal with it yourself then why am I here? Why did you rush me out of there?" She began to sob, giving him a slight idea of what she was feeling. He pulled her onto his lap and held her close, comforting her like he would a child. "I'm sorry, but you need to talk about this with someone, and if it's not going to be me, I'm taking you to a professional."

"Please, just hold me." And he did.


	6. Chapter 6

She bit her lip to stifle the sound of her tears as she sat in Will's bathtub. She hated herself so much for what she had done at the bar. She hated herself even more for the pain that she was still holding on to from her attack. The pills, the alcohol, nothing numbed her, and she needed to be numb. She was so sick of feeling everything swirling around in her mind. She took a deep breath and let herself go under the water, washing away the remnants of her tears.

Maybe she did need to talk to somebody, a therapist. It did sound like a healthy thing to do, but it wasn't a therapist's business. It was nobody's business, but hers and Will's. She knew that she could trust him, and he would definitely know what to say to help her, and he would be glad to listen. But somehow she just couldn't open up.

She coughed and sputtered when she came back to the surface of the water. The sort of cleansing didn't help. She still felt vulnerable and dirty. Suddenly, as if she wasn't thinking anymore, she pulled the plug, stood from the bathtub, and walked across the room, leaving a trail of water in her wake. She leaned down to where she had left her purse and dug into a back compartment, pulling out a small pouch with a needle inside.

She filled her veins with the drug and hurriedly hid the needle before it overtook her mind. Her eyelids felt heavy, all of a sudden, and she tried her hardest to get into a pair of Will's cotton pajamas before she passed out. She hadn't done hard drugs in so long that her body wasn't prepared for the sudden dose. She took a deep breath as she buttoned the last button on the shirt. She began to walk, but suddenly fell to her weak knees. She licked her lips and tried to stand as the room continued to spin. It was a bad trip. She couldn't control it.

Once she got up enough strength she used the door to stand. She walked into Will's room where he was fast asleep on the bed. She had taken to sleeping on the couch for a while, but she wanted to feel the warmth of his body against hers. She walked closer to the bed, but fell on top of him in her disheveled state. He jumped and found her trying to get off him.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"I'm trying to walk, honey. Help me lie next to you." He did as she said and lifted her to the other side of the bed. She began to breathe easier as he pulled the covers over her body.

"Karen, what's going on?"

"Hold me, honey. Please." He wrapped his arm around her, and she cuddled into his chest. It was when she had finally passed out that Will pulled himself from her tight grip. She hadn't turned the bathroom light off in her rush to get to him, and he stood to perform the task.

He stopped before he turned down the light switch. Water was all over the floor, and he cringed before walking into the room and wiping the floor. He followed the trail of water all the way to her open purse. Will wasn't normally one to snoop or break anyone's privacy, especially Karen's, but something told him to go through the purse. It felt wrong, but he did it anyway.

He ruffled through the bag, finding her checkbook, makeup, condoms, birth control pills, her glasses, her contacts; nothing seemed out of place. Nothing seemed different from any other woman's purse, until he found the back compartment. He unzipped it and scrunched his forehead when he found a small pouch with a needle in it. It was empty so he logically knew why she had passed out only moments before. He was so angry with her that he didn't even know what to do next.

He wanted to rip her out of bed and scream at her for acting so stupid. He wanted her to open up to him. He wanted so many things, justice and help. He wanted to kill the man who had done such a thing to her, ruined her life. She was so happy before the event and it got ruined within a moment.

But how could he be angry with her, really? It wasn't her fault. She was only dealing with her problem the best way that she knew how. He honestly wished that she would just tell him what had happened that night. Nobody knew what had actually happened and it had to be killing her on the inside to have to relive that pain all the time. He put the items back into her purse and sighed, making his way back to bed. He looked at her peaceful face and suddenly understood her a little bit more. He decided that he wasn't going to address the issue of her drug use. He was just going to let it go and carefully watch her, making sure that she didn't hurt herself.

He crawled back into bed and pulled the covers over him. Her breathing was even and regular, and he smiled at the innocence of her face. He wrapped his arm around her, as she had previously requested, and held her close. His lips met her forehead in a gentle kiss before he laid his head down and succumbed to sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

Will had never asked Karen what had been in the needle that he found in her purse. She probably wouldn't have told him if he did ask. It would have led to another argument, and he was so sick of yelling at her. He hated treating her like a child. He knew that she hated it too.

She stayed with them for another month. Grace continued to ask questions, mostly to Will. She didn't understand why Karen was still there, and why she tended to fall asleep in his arms. She finally took the opportunity to address the issue when Jack took Karen out shopping.

"Will, why is she still here?" He stopped dusting the furniture and turned to face her.

"What do you mean? They still haven't caught the guy who broke into her house. I told her she could stay until she's ready to leave."

"I understand that, but isn't there a time in everyone's life when they need to grow up and stop depending on their gay lawyer?"

"You don't understand anything, Grace! She's scared to death, and I'm the only one that she trusts enough to help her!" His voice was loud and full of anger. How could Grace suggest that she was taking advantage of them? Silence engulfed the room and the two friends were left staring at each other.

"Calm down. I was only saying that, it's really hard for all three of us to live here."

"It is not. She hardly takes up any room."

"She's driving me crazy! She eats all the time, she drinks all of our alcohol, and she's always passed out in front of the television! You mean you actually like her being here?"

"Yes. I love the fact that I can be here to help her. I love the fact that she lets me see her cry. And, Grace, I love the fact that she trusts me enough to hold her when she can't get to sleep by herself."

Grace stared at him in disbelief. She couldn't believe what he had just said to her, the things that he had willingly admitted. She stepped forward and took his hand in hers. Once their eyes met, she began to whisper.

"Did someone hurt her, Will?"

----------

She felt the powder go through her nose, and she smiled at the feeling. She couldn't wait until it overtook her body, mind, and soul. Jack had taken her to Barney's to pick out new clothes for his audition for an off-Broadway show. She had excused herself and rushed to the bathroom, finding the cocaine that she had scored earlier in the day.

"Where have you been, Karebear? I found this shirt that would look really good on you." He held up a dark blue shirt and she smiled.

"It's cute, honey."

"It's better than cute. It's fabulous." She pulled a bottle of pills from her purse and took a few. He cocked his head and grabbed the bottle from her hands.

"I thought Will took your pills away." She furrowed her eyebrows and snatched the bottle back from his hands.

"He missed some." She winked, but felt dizzy. She smiled a little bit before taking his hand and leading him to the cashier. They bought his armful of clothes and left for Will and Grace's apartment.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"_Karen, don't come home right now. Grace is asking a lot of questions and I want you to be clear on what I told her before she asks you the same things. Meet me at my office, okay?"_

Karen listened to the voice mail once again as Jack tried to lead her into the building. He pulled on her hand, but she didn't go in. Instead, she told him that she had to go to the bank. She waved down a cab and made her way to Will's office.

"Honey, you sounded really freaked out in your message. What did you tell Grace?" She leaned over his desk and looked into his dark brown eyes. He had been working on a case, but suddenly forgot about it when she walked through the door.

"She started asking questions and we yelled, and she asked if you were…you know." She nodded her head, neither one of them had ever said the words aloud. "I told her that some guy broke into your house and threatened you with a gun. Then I said that he roughed you around a little bit, but left when Rosario called the police."

"You called me down here so you could tell me that?"

"Well, I didn't want her to make you uncomfortable." She smiled at him, high as a kite, but still aware of what was going on.

"You really care about me don't you honey?"

"Did you ever have any doubt?" Their smiles connected and she felt warmth envelope her. She shook her head of thought before sitting down in a chair across from him. "Do you want to go to dinner tonight?"

"Why, Wilma, are you asking me out on a date?" She smirked and pulled a bottle out of her purse.

"If that's the way you want to look at it." She slid the bottle across the desk and closed her purse. "What's this?"

"It's the pills that you missed when you went through my stuff." His look was cross, but he was glad that she was being honest. "I just figured you should have all of it if you're going to help me."

"And…"

"And what, honey?"

"How about the needle in your purse?" Her eyes widened and her mouth fell agape. She felt betrayed.

"You went through my purse?"

"I know that it was wrong, but you passed out so fast that I didn't have a chance to figure out what you were on."

"You had no right to do that."

"I felt like I had no choice. You don't tell me anything, and I get worried."

"You know what, Will, I'll tell you everything." She stood from her seat and looked straight into his eyes. "This whole thing is unbearable right now, okay. The needle was for some heroine that I got from a guy I met at that bar we went to. And this…" she pulled a short tube out of her pocket and tossed it at him. "It's from the cocaine that I scored today, outside Barney's. Oh and here's another one; I haven't had an orgasm in months, not even by myself. My life is a complete wreck. I can't go to sleep at night without seeing his face. I've gained ten pounds in the past two months. _And_ I get stoned in the elevator when I come home from work. Is there anything else that you think you need to know?" Her hands were on her hips in defiance, and her head was held high.

"Tell me what happened that night."

"Go fuck yourself." He was taken aback by her choice of words, but was quick to stop her when she reached for the door. His hand was tight around her wrist and she tried her hardest to get away.

"I'm not letting you go." He pulled her into a hug, feeling her tensed body suddenly melt against him. He meant the words in more ways than one, and he knew that she understood. She wrapped her arms around his neck and tried to stop the tears that seemed to constantly flow. Her lips reached his ear.

"Please help me." He held her tighter as the rain began to pour outside the window, matching the mood of the two confidants in the office.

"It's going to be okay, Kare. I promise, we'll make it okay." And for some reason, she knew that she could believe him.


	8. Chapter 8

The rain was pouring heavily as Will and Karen ran across the street, hiding under an awning. She hadn't taken the limo to his office so they had to settle for trying to catch a cab. The streets were bare, and they hurried towards the subway. The escalator took them down below the ground and they were finally dry, the faint smell of concrete and sweat playing with their senses. They ran their cards through the slots and walked down a smaller flight of stairs to wait for the train. It was as empty as the streets, and they sat down close to the doors. Silence enveloped the car of the train for a few minutes before Will tried to speak again.

"Karen, will you tell me what happened?" She smiled bitterly, his sentiment going to her head. She wanted so badly to tell him everything, but she just couldn't. She couldn't even say the words to herself.

"I can't, honey. Please leave it for a while." And he did. He didn't ask anymore questions. Instead, he put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close until she laid her head on his shoulder. She hugged him, taking him by surprise, and leaned up to place her cheek against his neck. He felt so warm to her, contrasting with the chill of the rain. She breathed him in and ran her hand through his hair, sending a jolt through his stomach at her gentle touch. He returned the embrace and ran his hands over her back. To him it felt like she needed some comfort. Suddenly her lips made contact with his neck, and he felt as if he were about to catch fire. Her tongue jetted out from between her lips and gently touched his skin before he pulled away.

"What are you doing?" Her eyes widened and she felt panic arising within her throat. She hadn't meant to be so forward with him, it just sort of happened.

"Oh, honey, I'm so sorry. I just…well, I don't know why I did that. Please don't feel weird, I didn't mean to freak you out." He nodded and pulled her closer to him, her head on his shoulder once again. He knew that she was coked out and probably wasn't thinking straight. The only problem was, he thought that he felt a spark ignite between them. But it was only his imagination, right?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

She had eaten her way through a whole bowl of popcorn, watching Lifetime movies and drinking cola all afternoon. She knew that sitting around all day wasn't good for her, especially when she knew how much weight she was gaining, but she didn't feel like moving. She didn't feel like doing a lot of things.

One thing that she was doing a lot of, though, was thinking. She thought about what she had gotten herself into. She wanted to just live her life like she did before her haunted memory, but she just couldn't. She couldn't move on. She couldn't get his face, his hands, and his eyes out of her mind. No matter how many pills she took, how many times she had tried to overdose on heroine or cocaine, she could never get rid of him.

She promised Will that she wouldn't take any more illegal drugs, and she kept her promise, for the most part. She gave him her stash and he threw it out. It was easy to tell that it meant a lot to him so she stopped taking drugs and drinking alcohol. Instead, she spent more time eating, filling her addictions with new ones. She had gained fifteen pounds, and she and Jack had to continuously go out shopping for new clothes. She felt fat, her breasts had gone up a whole cup size, and all she wanted to do was sleep. She felt very unattractive and like she would never be loved again.

"What the hell are you doing?" Grace's voice found her deep in thought. She shrugged, hoping for a rephrasing of her question. "What I mean is, why are you still on your ass? It's four o' clock and you haven't moved all day."

"That's not true, honey. I peed an hour ago." Grace rolled her eyes and sat down next to her on the couch.

"I know that this is going to hurt your feelings, but we're roommates now, and best friends, so I'm just going to say it. Karen, maybe you wouldn't be gaining so much weight if you didn't sit around all the time."

"Honey, I'm well aware of my weight, and I don't care."

"Since when do you not care how you look? You're a beautiful woman, and you used to know that." She rolled her eyes and locked them with Grace's. They were filled with anger and bitterness and Grace was taken aback.

"Grace, leave me alone. You don't have to pretend to worry about me. I already know everything that you could possibly want to tell me about myself." She stood from the couch, never breaking eye contact. Her voice was cold. "And don't you _ever_ say anything about my weight again. It's none of your business."

"Karen, I didn't mean to…" Grace's hand made contact with hers, and she was stopped from walking away.

"Let go."

"Karen, please tell me the truth. Were you raped?" She swallowed hard, never having heard the words aloud. Her eyes felt heavy and she began to shake. Grace felt it and stood to pull her into a hug, only to be pushed away.

"Of course I wasn't. Will told you what happened, honey. Stop trying to make more of it than it is." And with her statement, she walked into the bathroom, grabbing a suitcase of clothes along the way. Suddenly, she needed to take a shower. Grace didn't stop, though. She followed Karen closely and burst through the door. "What the hell are you doing?"

"I want to know why you don't talk to me. You talk to Will, and you cry to Will, and you even sleep in the same bed with him. What gives, Karen?"

"I do not want to talk about this, honey."

"Well, you need to give me something because…"

"Grace, leave it." Her words were spoken with an edge, and Grace knew that the conversation was over. She nodded and walked out of the bathroom to let Karen take her shower.

Instead of getting into the shower right away, Karen turned the water on and stripped her clothes from her body. She looked at herself in the full length mirror behind the door and sighed. It was hard to believe that she was once a healthy, active woman. She needed to do something about it. Her life was continuously falling apart, and if she didn't do something soon, she wouldn't survive the fall.


	9. Chapter 9

"Poodle, I need your help." Karen rushed into Jack's apartment to find him jumping rope in his boxers. Both of their eyes widened and they looked at each other in shock. It wasn't often that he was halfway naked and jumping in front of her. "Honey, why are you…"

"Because it's freeing." They continued to stare for another moment before they burst into laughter. It was the first time in months that she had laughed wholeheartedly and it was very welcoming. He walked closer to her and took her in an embrace as the laughter continued.

"Oh, honey, I needed that." He kissed her lips in a form of greeting and she smiled brightly at his example of affection, even though he did nothing to cover himself.

"What did you need, Karebear?"

"Well, you're really in to this fitness stuff, right." He gave her a strange look and held up his jumping rope in response. "Okay, um, I wanted to know if you'd help me with that."

"Jumping rope?"

"No, Poodle, I'm fat and I need you to help me get thin again." He was left in shock at her sudden admission. Flaws were never something that they discussed together.

"Of course I'll help you. In fact, I'm getting ready to go to the gym right now. Go and get some sweats on and meet me in the hallway, okay?"

"Oh, thank you. But I don't have any sweats." He rolled his eyes in a playful manner and pulled her into his bedroom by her hand. He handed her a pair of his sweatpants and a fitted tee-shirt. "Thanks, honey, you're a lifesaver." She hugged him again before hurrying to his bathroom to change her clothes.

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Karen had been dieting for almost a week before Jack would allow her to step on a scale. She personally didn't own one and never really thought about the amount that she weighed, only the size of her waist. She closed her eyes as he looked down at the digital face of the scale.

"What is it, Poodle? Is it good?"

"You lost five pounds in a week." She opened her eyes and excitedly looked down to the numbers before her.

"Oh my gosh, honey, we did it." She jumped off of the scale and hugged him tightly, her excitement showing in their embrace. He picked her up and spun her around in a circle as they giggled together. At the sound of the commotion in his bathroom, Will hurried through the open door.

"What the hell is going on in here?" Karen pulled herself from Jack's embrace and hurried over to him. She was jumping up and down in front of him and clapping her hands, something that he hadn't seen her do in a very long time.

"I lost five pounds."

"Oh, Kare, that's great." She hugged him and continued to giggle. Jack hurried over and hugged her from behind, sandwiching her in between the two. They all shared the happiness of the moment, completely thrilled for something good.


	10. Chapter 10

Will watched Karen as she slept peacefully beside him. She had had a good day, never crying once. He looked at her pale skin glowing in the moonlight, softening her features. He had never taken the time to notice just how beautiful she was. Her face was losing its plumpness, due to almost constant exercising with Jack, and she was finally taking better care of herself. He was proud of her, of course, but he couldn't help shake the feeling that she was only hiding her hurt better than before.

She moved in her sleep and some of her curls slid over her face, hiding her features from him. He couldn't help, but watch her. What was he thinking? If she knew then she would most definitely stop sleeping in his room. She would probably go and stay with Jack for a while if he told her how much he was growing to admire her. She was so strange, so beautifully strange and it was fascinating.

He remembered back to the time on the subway when she embraced him. Her lips made contact with his neck and he could still feel the fire that she had ignited. He wondered if that meant that she felt the same way about him. It was possible. She never spoke of her feelings and it could have just been something else that she was hiding.

He looked over her shoulder and gently pushed her hair away from her face. He cuddled close behind her and hugged her to his body, feeling her warmth against his entire length. She sighed in her sleep and her hand came to rest over his as she unconsciously pushed herself closer to him. Before he could help himself he leaned down and placed his lips to her cheek. She didn't move at all and he suddenly became bolder, kissing her cheek again.

His lips trailed down the side of her face to her neck, and he breathed in her scent while his kisses became more staccato. She began to react under his lips and sighed, slowly waking from a peaceful sleep. She opened her eyes and turned her head to the source of her waking to find Will hovering over her face. She was very confused and furrowed her brow in question. Instead of giving an explanation, Will slowly leaned down and brushed his lips across hers. He lingered for a moment before pulling away and looking back into her eyes.

They were both taken aback when she leaned up to take his lips with hers; barely giving them a chance to absorb what was happening. All she knew was that his lips felt soft and loving against hers, and she wanted more. They renewed the kiss and she wrapped her arms around his neck. The sheets on the bed rustled as he moved on top of her, slipping his tongue into her mouth. Her sigh was lost in the depths of his mouth as she massaged his tongue with her own.

She softly moaned into his mouth as his hands slipped under her shirt to caress her stomach. He slowly ran his hands over her breasts and she wrapped her legs around his waist. Neither of them acknowledged their situation and she reached in between his legs, running her hand over his growing bulge.

She rolled them over and lay on top of him, her legs straddling his hips. Her hands found their way to the bottom of his shirt and she pushed them underneath it, feeling his muscles. Her mind had completely opened and she saw the face of her attacker, seemingly out of nowhere. Suddenly, she pulled away and sat up on top of him. Her breathing was uneven and her eyes were searching his face for an answer.

She quickly got off him and hurried towards the door, closing it behind her. He mentally kicked himself for kissing her. Why did he do it? He should have had self-control, but his mind completely failed him when their lips touched. He sighed and calmed himself down before rolling out of bed. He found Karen on the couch, under a blanket and staring at the ceiling. She looked like she was thinking and panicking within herself.

"Karen…" He was stopped by her hand in the air. She sat up to look at him over the back of the couch.

"Why did we do that, honey?" He shrugged and sat on his knees behind the couch. He crossed his arms over the back and laid his head on them. "Well, I'm sorry. I know that you're not attracted to women, and when I did that on the subway a while ago, I'm just sorry."

"Please stop apologizing. It's my fault, I started it." She placed her hand on his arm and gave him a soft smile. "You liked it though, right?" Her smile grew and a small giggle escaped her lips. She was glad that he was already trying to make light of the situation. After all, he was gay. How far could it have really gone before he just couldn't do it anymore?

"It was very nice, honey." She took a deep breath. He smiled and began to walk back to his room, but he stopped after a few steps.

"Can I do it again?" He met her eyes and she seemed shocked. She nodded and remained seated while he walked over to her and placed his hand on her cheek. Their lips met and they felt the same surge of electricity that was felt in his bedroom. He pulled back before they got carried away again and smiled to her. "Goodnight."


	11. Chapter 11

Karen walked up to the door of her mansion and took a deep breath. She felt like she was taking advantage of Will and Grace's hospitality, and she knew that they had to be tired of her. She wanted to move on, let go of what happened to her. It was probably too soon, but she needed to be busy in order to forget.

She walked through the door and slowly went up the stairs. She was standing in front of her bedroom door, for the second time since the incident, but she couldn't bring herself to turn the doorknob. Maybe it was too soon. There was no rush to get back into her home, certainly not from any of her friends. She turned around to head for the stairs, but screamed loudly when she bumped into someone.

"Are you trying to kill my ears?" His hands were over his ears and he was shaking his head, trying to relieve the ringing.

"Will? What the hell are you doing here?" She pushed him from her and tried to control her breathing, a hand on her chest.

"I was coming to visit Grace and I saw you leaving work early. So I followed you."

"Honey, do you know how creepy that is? What if I didn't want you to know where I was going?" She began to walk towards the stairs, but he stopped her once again. She felt a small jolt through her stomach when his hand touched hers and she quickly turned around to face him. They looked into each other's eyes for only a moment.

"Open the door, Kare." His eyes were soft and full of meaning. Their hands remained fused and she shook her head, looking down to the floor.

"I don't think I can, honey. I thought I could, but it's too soon." Her eyes met his and she smiled, too fake for comfort. "Come on, I'll buy you coffee."

"After."

"Honey…" He cut her off with a stern look. They both knew that he had a sort of power of her, her actions. With one look he could make her do almost anything, and it scared her. She took a deep breath and walked closer to the door, her nose almost touching the oak.

Will's hand was being squeezed in hers as she turned the knob and threw the door open. The room looked peaceful, almost exactly how it would if she were still living there. But it was dark, the curtains were drawn and there was a layer of dust covering the surfaces. Her maids were still living and working at the mansion, but her room was off limits. Nobody was allowed in there, not even to clean.

She kicked her shoes off, confusing Will, and stepped through the door. It shouldn't have been so difficult, it was just a room. But for Karen it was a nightmare, utterly hellish. Her feet touched the soft carpet and her mind began to replay the events of that night.

"I heard noises from downstairs. He must have come in here when I was trying to figure out what was going on." Her brow furrowed and he listened intently. She was finally revealing the events from that evening. "I unzipped my dress and got ready to take it off when he shoved a gun into my back. I was so scared, honey."

She walked over to a metal divider that accented the room, separating the bed from the rest of it. Her hand let go of his and she reached out to touch the decoration, leaving a handprint in the dust. Her eyes scanned the bed and slowly made it to the floor. There was a darkened spot where her blood had stained the carpet. She cringed and took a deep breath.

"I thought he was just going to take some jewelry and leave, but he started putting his hands on me. I didn't move." She lay down on the floor where she had once been forced to remain, in the exact position that she had been in. She crossed her ankles and lifted her hands above her head. "He held me down like this." Tears fell from her eyes and she bit her lip to stop it from trembling. Will wanted to know what happened, but he wasn't sure if he could hear it. He didn't even want to imagine what had happened to her.

"Karen…"

"'Shut up, Karen, or I'll kill you!' That's what he said when I tried to get him off of me. 'You're going to shut up and lay there and I'm going to fuck your brains out!'" She sniffled and cleared her voice as she remembered, so vividly. She sounded cold, a voice that Will had never heard from her. Tears began to fall from his eyes as well. "Then he put his gun to my head and I shut up, and I just laid here, and he…" She couldn't finish, she was trembling too much. Will was quick to her side and he ran his hand through her hair.

"You don't have to say it." Her voice was loud when she found it and it made him cringe.

"It hurt so badly, Will, and I just let him do it. I laid her and let him fuck me, just like he said he was going to do." She sat up and met his eyes, never bothering to wipe away her tears. "He knew my name. I don't know how, but he knew my name and I can still hear him saying it in my head. I should have done something, but I let it happen."

"Oh, sweetie." He reached forward and pulled her into a hug. He didn't use her name, given what she had just said. "It's not your fault."

"I have to get out of here." He didn't wait for more as he stood from their embrace and helped her from the ground. He rushed her out of the room and closed the door behind them. She sat down on the floor, leaning against the wall and facing the door of her bedroom.

"What are you doing?" His voice was soft and full of empathy. He sat down next to her, their hips touching, and took her hand in his.

"Will, I have to move."

"You can live with me for a while."

"No, honey, I'm imposing. Grace doesn't like me there and I can't keep depending on you. I need to find an apartment or something. I don't live here anymore." She continued to stare at the door, a sigh escaping from her lips. "Where do I belong, Will?"


	12. Chapter 12

Her search for an apartment of her own was slow. It seemed like every apartment she found was just too small. She had a lot of things and closet space was a definite issue. But she couldn't stay with Will and Grace any longer. It sounded wrong, and it felt wrong. It felt like she was breaking a sort of routine in the friendship between the four of them.

Will seemed to have a newfound respect for her after she told him what had happened. She didn't mean for it to all come out the way it did, sounding so vulgar, but she was glad that he knew. She didn't have to hide from him and he didn't pity her, the way that she had feared.

Karen was standing in Will's bathroom one evening after a bubble bath. She was another five pounds thinner, but she still felt that she looked horrible, hideous. She was clad in a black bra and a matching thong when she looked into the full length mirror. She didn't feel like Karen anymore. It was like alcohol, pills, and sex were the only things that made her herself. Since Will had taken away her pills and alcohol, and she didn't feel much like having sex, for obvious reasons, she was a different person. She was somebody that she wasn't sure if she liked or not. The uncertainty is what she hated the most.

"Kare, are you coming to bed?" Will's knock on the door brought her out of her daze. She smiled at how nice it sounded when he said that. It had been so long since she had felt so cared for.

"Yeah, honey." She stepped into her black, silky pajama pants and began buttoning her shirt. She brushed her teeth and cleaned up the bathroom before she opened the door and turned out the light. "What are you reading?"

"I'm looking in this magazine for apartments that are around here. Look at this one." She flopped down on her stomach and squinted at the page in front of her. She couldn't see it at all, but she smiled like she could. Her glasses were on the bedside table and she didn't feel like moving to get them. "It's right down the street, and it has a walk-in closet."

"That's my kind of place, honey." She smiled and rolled over to look at the ceiling. Will sat the magazine on his table and watched her, knowing that she couldn't tell without her glasses on.

"Are you alright? You seem like something's on your mind." She shrugged and placed her hands behind her head, lying on them. Will watched as her shirt lifted up, just a little, to reveal her bellybutton. He couldn't help, but stare at her pale skin. It looked so soft.

"Can you keep a secret?"

"Of course I can." She sat up and turned to lie on her stomach, her face next to his.

"I'm just not feeling very beautiful right now." A small laugh escaped her lips, almost embarrassed. "It sounds silly, doesn't it, honey?"

"No, it doesn't." She shrugged and rolled over to join him under the covers of his bed.

"Goodnight, honey." He turned off the light and settled further into the bed. After a moment of getting comfortable, he scooted closer to her and put an arm around her waist, caressing her stomach with his hand for a moment. She couldn't believe that his touch was actually beginning to turn her on. She hadn't felt that way in a long time. She wanted the feeling to last so she was quick to begin speaking. "Honey…"

"What is it?" His question came when she didn't finish her statement. She turned around and lay on her back, turning her head to face him. It was difficult for her to find the words to say to get her question across.

"I know that you're not attracted to women, but…" His lips met hers in an instant. He knew exactly what she was thinking; he was thinking the same thing. He deepened the kiss and slid his tongue in between her lips. She turned her body to fully face him as their tender kiss continued. He pulled away and looked into her gleaming eyes, hoping that he had satisfied her thoughts. "Touch me."

"What?"

"Don't stop. Put your hands on me."

"You want me to make love to you?"

"Yeah, honey."

"Are you sure? You can't be ready for it yet. Maybe we should just talk."

"No. I want you to. Please, Will, make me feel beautiful."

"You are beautiful, Kare." A smile lit her features before she leaned up to capture his lips, making up his mind. His hand slid along her side and came to rest on her thigh. She rolled over on top of him and straddled him, sitting up. He sat up as well, holding her on his lap, their faces only inches apart.

He slowly brought his hands up and unbuttoned her shirt, sliding it from her shoulders and tossing it to the floor. She mimicked his motion and took his shirt off as well. They stayed still for a moment, neither of them knowing how to go about continuing. It seemed slightly awkward, for obvious reasons, but it also felt right. There was so much trust between them that it was a comfortable step to take.

She took his hands in hers and placed them on her breasts, sending a jolt through his body. He couldn't believe that he was touching her in that way. She leaned forward and pressed her lips against his and his hands began to move for themselves, massaging her breasts before reaching behind her to unhook her bra. He tossed it to where their shirts lay and moved so that she was on her back, him on top of her. He kissed her neck and began making his way down her body, in between her breasts and down to her bellybutton. She shivered, still leery of being touched like that.

She sighed as he slid her silk pants down her legs, her thong following quickly behind them. She felt so bare in front of his eyes, vulnerable. She couldn't meet his gaze and bit her lip as he surely observed her naked body.

"Look at me." She met his eyes to find that he was only observing her face, not her body. She smiled softly and he leaned down to kiss her lips again. She ran her hands down his bare back and under the line of his pants, resting them on his buttocks. She pushed his pants and boxers over his hips and down his legs with her feet, as well as accidentally pulling the comforter from their naked forms. They were left bare to the moonlight that was shining through the window.

He kissed her neck and ran his fingers through her hair as her hands made their way down the front of his body. She took him in her hand and gently stroked him, a bit shocked by her own boldness. He sighed into her ear and kissed back up to her lips. He reached down her body and spread her legs further. She released him from her grip and wrapped her arms under his, holding his shoulders in her hands. His eyes met hers in a questioning motion, asking if she should continue, if she was okay. A flashback of _him_ suddenly flew through her mind, at the most inopportune time, and she shook her head to keep the thoughts away. She took a deep breath and nodded. He understood and kissed her softly on the lips before slowly completing a connection between them.

"Don't move yet." Her whisper came in the form of a sigh. She wrapped her legs around him and kissed his lips deeply, letting her tongue meet his in a playful fashion. She saw _his_ face whenever she closed her eyes, so she kept them open. It was easier when she could only see Will. Her hands caressed his muscular back before coming to rest on his shoulders again. She squeezed her legs tighter around his waist before releasing him, telling him that it was alright to move. He pulled out and pushed back into her, her sigh getting lost in his mouth.

She felt so warm and soft beneath him. He hadn't had sex with very many women in his life and he was aware of the rising nerves in his stomach, not wanting to disappoint her. His motions became shaky and Karen sensed his nerves. She kissed his lips softly before finding his eyes.

"Are you okay?" He whispered, finding his voice through increased breathing.

"Yeah, honey." He quickened the pace and a small moan escaped from her lips. It felt so wonderful to have him inside her. She could hardly believe that Will, of all people, would be the one to make her feel alive again.

Her fingernails dug into his shoulders, leaving marks behind, before she ran them down his body to rest on his hips. Pleasure overtook his nerves and his motions became bolder, smoother than before. He ran his fingers through her hair.

She felt an orgasm beginning to burn in her stomach. Her excitement increased as she realized that he was bringing her to the point of a climax. It was something that she hadn't felt in a long time and she appreciated it more than she ever thought she would. She bit his lip and he could feel her breath quickening. Her eyes became wet with tears, but she was filled with too much pleasure to look for the meaning behind them.

His pace became faster and he plowed deeper into her body. Suddenly he felt her shiver and shake beneath him. Her muscles flexed around him and it was too much for him to take. She clung to him, pulling him closer with her legs while his climax burst within. He didn't stop moving until her sighs of satisfaction ceased and the waves stopped rippling through his veins. He collapsed on top of her sweaty body, kissing her neck.

Her breath was heavy and she felt like she would never find it again. He pulled back a little to look into her eyes, which were filled with tears. He kissed her hard on the mouth while his hands wiped her tears from her cheeks.

"You're beautiful." A smile made its way across her face and she began to sob uncontrollably. Each emotion completely contradicted the other. "Did I hurt you? What's wrong?"

"It was so good, honey." Her lips met his and she kissed him through her outburst. She ran her hands through his hair. Their lips disconnected and he pulled out of her body. She stayed on her back, naked, and completely satisfied. Her only thoughts were Will and how wonderful he was.

He sat up and pulled the blanket over them, smiling at how mellow she seemed. After lying back down he turned to look at Karen. She was staring at the ceiling, but her hazel eyes met his when he took her hand. Tears were still falling down her cheeks. He reached forward and wiped them away with his thumbs.

"Can I hold you?" She smiled, genuinely, touched by his request.

"Only if its all night." His smile joined hers in a kiss. She rolled over and molded her back to his stomach as he wrapped his arm around her waist. His hand slid up to caress her still bare breasts before resting on her stomach. He kissed her neck and pulled her as close as he could. Life could seem so soft sometimes.


	13. Chapter 13

Karen awoke to small kisses being placed on her neck. It tickled and she scrunched her face. Where the hell was she? She remembered alcohol, a lot of alcohol. She remembered that Jack had taken her to a bar, Will had left early to get some sleep for a meeting the next day, and she had…what happened?

"Wake up, baby. I want to go again before work." Her eyes darted open at the voice of the stranger next to her in bed. Her breathing halted and she quickly turned around to see who it was. She held the sheet closer to her body, which she discovered was bare, and found his face. He was a younger man, thirty-five or so, and he was very handsome. "What's wrong?"

"What the hell happened last night?" He squinted his eyes and questioningly smiled.

"You don't remember? We had the greatest sex of my life and you don't remember?" She sat up, clutching the sheet close, and bit her lip trying to remember. He rolled his eyes. "You were sitting at the bar with your little friend, and I bought you a drink…"

"I have to go, honey. Look away." He turned his head away and she hurriedly dressed. He spoke while she did so.

"Anastasia, I know you had a few drinks, but you said you wanted me. I didn't know you couldn't hold you alcohol well enough to make a decent decision. I didn't know you'd been drinking so much." She at least found some humor in the use of her alias before realizing that nothing at all was funny. She finished dressing and sat down on the bed.

"First off, I can hold my alcohol. And second, tell me exactly what happened."

He told her his version of the story. She had, apparently, accepted his offer to buy her a drink and soon they were in a cab to his apartment, making out. She had made the first move and that fact made her feel even sicker to her stomach. They had sex in his bed and she passed out soon after.

"I'm not that undesirable am I?" His question was directed toward her disgusted look.

"No, it's just…did I make noise?"

"What?"

"Did I make noise when we did it?" He smiled, but she slapped his shoulder. "Damn it, don't be so stupid, I'm serious. Was I loud?"

"Yeah, it was hot." She squinted her eyes at him in a disapproving fashion. She was glad to know that he hadn't given her an orgasm, or else she would have been virtually silent. She never made noise when she was brought to the edge of her feelings. He scooted closer to her and gave her a cocky smile. "I really had you going." She pushed his hands away from her and walked towards the door, but stopped before she exited.

"Oh, you didn't have me going, honey. I was faking it."

----------

She could have hit herself for being so stupid. She had made love to Will only two days before and she was already screwing around with…what was his name? Paul, Steve, Kevin, she didn't know. To be fair, he didn't know her name either. She felt like she could vomit. She hated herself. She needed a fix of some sort. She walked down the street towards an alley that she used to visit very frequently before Will had made her clean up. It was where she found a man who always had the best of everything, her drug dealer. She bought a syringe of heroin and hid it in her purse before she went back to Will's apartment. Shame seemed to be a constant fixture in her life, and she hated it.


	14. Chapter 14

"Are you here, Karen?" Jack walked into Will and Grace's apartment to find Karen lying on the floor. She had her feet up on the couch and her eyes were glazed over. "Oh, shit. What happened to you?" He leaned down and placed a hand on her cheek. Her eyes darted to meet his and it was as if she had just noticed that he had arrived. "What are you doing?"

"Watching the ceiling." He looked up to the ceiling to see what was so interesting about it, but there was nothing different. "Have you ever noticed how pretty it is, honey?"

"You're high, aren't you?" She laughed bitterly.

"Why, do you want some?" He rolled his eyes and put an arm beneath her knees and the other behind her back, lifting her from the ground. She weighed virtually nothing in his arms and he carried her to Will's bed. When he laid her down she put her hands on each side of his face. "I love you, Poodle."

"I love you too, Kare." He rolled his eyes again and tried to move to pull a blanket over her, but her hands didn't let go of his face. She pulled him in for a kiss, wrapping her arms around his neck. He had had plenty of experiences with a high Karen in the past, but that time was different. She wasn't giggly or happy, she seemed sad. Her lips left his and he pulled back to look into her glossy, hazel eyes. They were full of tears and with one blink the tears fell.

"I fucking hate myself, Jack." She began to uncontrollably sob and he leaned down to hug her. She clung tightly to him and her tears stained his shirt. He could count on one hand the times he had seen her cry, and her sudden outburst scared him. "I want to die. Please let me die."

"No, Karen, don't talk like that. I love you. I don't want you to die."

"Hold me, honey. Lay with me and hold me. Please." Without further thought, he climbed onto the bed and pulled her so close that they could have been conjoined. He cried along with her until her eyes closed and she had finally cried herself to sleep.

----------

Will walked into his apartment, whistling. He had 'killed' in his meeting and he felt like he was walking on air. He closed the door and hung up his coat when Jack rushed into the room with a determined look on his face. His eyes were red, as if he had been crying, and he acted scared.

"Jack, what were you doing in my room?"

"She said she wanted to die. She was stoned out of her mind and she said that she wanted to die. What's happening to her?" He put his hands on his hips and waited for a response.

"Karen?"

"Who the fuck do you think?"

"Calm down. I'm sure you misunderstood. I told her to stop doing illegal drugs, and she promised that she would." He loosened his tie and walked to his room to change. Jack followed him, but stopped when they ran into Karen. She was trying to walk out of the room at the same time that they were walking in. Her eyes were red and she had dark circles underneath them. She looked horrible and Will had to look deep to see if he could find the real her. "Karen, what's going on?"

"I'm going to pee, that's what's going on." Her words were of a lower tone than she usually used and she sounded empty. She pushed past them and grabbed a bottle of vodka from the coffee table before walking into the bathroom.

"Will, I told you. You need to do something before she gets worse."

"You're her Poodle."

"Exactly, but you're the one who can help her. You know whatever secret she's been hiding from everyone else." Grace walked through the door and smiled at the guys.

"Why are you hanging around the bathroom like that? We have two." She sat down on the couch and put her feet on the table, exhausted.

"Will's going to talk to Karen about how stoned she is all the time, even though she promised she would stop." He joined Grace on the couch and her eyes widened.

"Good luck with that. She's going to freak out on you." Will knocked on the door, but he didn't receive a response. Grace and Jack remained on the couch, neither of them wanting to miss the argument that was sure to ensue. He walked over to the kitchen and took a knife from the counter to pick the lock. He was successful and hurriedly walked into the bathroom. He found Karen sitting against the wall in the large shower, clutching a bottle of vodka in her hand, and crying.

"Karen, what the hell is wrong with you? I thought you told me you'd stop doing illegal drugs."

"How do you know it was illegal, honey?"

"Because I've seen you on heroine before." Her eyes met his, coldly, and she stared at him while bringing the bottle to her lips. "Maybe you should go and sleep it off."

"I'm fine. Get away from me." He walked closer to her and looked down into her eyes. "I said…" She was interrupted when he turned on the cold water of the shower, drenching her. He stepped back so he wouldn't get wet as she rushed to her feet and turned the water off. "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"You need to stop all of this, Karen! You will never feel better if you don't!" She threw the bottle of vodka at him, barely missing his head as it smashed into the wooden door. "What if that would have hit me?"

"Maybe then you would have stopped talking!" She tried to push past him, and the shattered glass, to walk out the door, but he grabbed her wrist and pulled her to him. "Leave me alone!"

"No. I care about you way too much to just leave you alone." She bit her bottom lip and looked into his eyes. His tone of voice and the connection through their eyes had an odd calming effect upon them. He brushed his hand over her cheek.

"God, honey, I just want the pain to stop." Her whisper barely found its way to his ears. "Let me deal with this the way I know how."

"No."

"You can't treat me like a child, honey. I'm a big girl and I know what I'm doing." He pulled her into a hug and she accepted.

"You have no idea what you're doing." She held him closer and began to cry into his shirt. He kissed her head and comforted her, never wanting to let her go.


	15. Chapter 15

He continued to pound into her vigorously, as her orgasm overtook her body. She moaned into his mouth and wrapped her legs tighter around his waist as he filled her, reaching his own pleasure. He collapsed on top of her and sighed heavily. He didn't move for a moment and looked down into her eyes.

"Are you okay?"

"Wonderful." Will pulled out of her body and lay down next to her, pulling her close to him. She kissed his chest and hugged him tightly. It had been so amazing to make love to him again. It wasn't at all awkward, like their first time had been, but it was passionate. She could tell that he was still worried about making her uncomfortable, but it wasn't difficult to put him at ease.

"I didn't hurt you or anything, did I?" He rolled over onto his side and fully faced her. He wrapped his arm around her waist and pecked her lips.

"No, honey, it was great." She kissed him hard on the mouth and ran a hand through his hair. His hands were on her buttocks and he pulled her closer. She didn't plan on sleeping with him again, but having his body so close to hers was too much to bear. She woke him in the middle of the night and they quietly made love.

But she felt guilty. She hadn't told him about the stranger she had slept with only a couple of days before. She was so embarrassed though. She felt like a slut, maybe because she had acted like one.

"What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing."

"You're a liar. When your eyebrows get really close together like that, you're in deep thought." She smiled, even though she knew she had to tell him. She felt flattered that he had been paying so much attention to her that he even knew when she was thinking about something. It also scared her. It meant that she couldn't pretend with him anymore. He knew when she was lying, and that was how she hid from people. Lying was a large part of her mask.

"I had sex with some guy the other night." He pulled back a little to look into her eyes. "I don't remember anything, but I woke up in his bed. I was thinking about how to tell you without making you angry with me, honey." He took a deep breath and sighed.

"I guess it's fair. I mean, were not a couple or anything." His voice sounded fine, but she could tell that he was disappointed in her. Maybe she could read him too.

"Honey, it didn't mean anything. I don't even know his name."

"You woke me in the middle of the night to have sex, and then you tell me how your one-night stands don't mean anything. So, what are _we_ doing?"

"Will, you are not just another one-night stand." She pecked his lips and brought their situation to his attention. "I know how much we care about each other, and I could never hurt you like I hurt…damn it, what was his name?" She scrunched her nose and thought for a moment. Will smiled at how easily she could get distracted. He kissed her lips once more.

"Don't worry about it, Kare. We all do things we regret. And I don't think you're a slut, even though I know you think you are." She smiled and he hugged her naked body close to his. He understood, and he wasn't angry at all. That was something she loved about Will, he accepted her for who she was. He understood who she was. She smiled and drifted off to sleep in his caring arms, wondering how it was always so simple with him.


	16. Chapter 16

"Sorry, I'm late, honey." Karen rushed into the office after having lunch with Will. Their night together was wonderful and it was hard for them to say goodbye. Her smile was bright until she met Grace's eyes.

"Karen, where have you been?" Grace seemed angry with her for a reason that she didn't quite understand.

"What's wrong, honey? Is it that dress that's harshing your mellow, because I can understand that." Grace rolled her eyes and Karen sat down at her desk.

"No, Karen, it's not my dress that's bothering me. What's bothering me is the fact that you're lazy and you never show up on time. It wouldn't be so bad, but you promised that you'd be here early today to help me."

"Honey, calm down, your face is starting to match your hair." She walked over to her friend and looked into her angry eyes. "I'm here now. What do you need me to do?"

"I've already finished it, Karen!"

"I forgot. I'm sorry."

"That's not good enough for me! I need help! I hired you for help! But you can't do anything!"

"What crawled up your ass and died? Stop yelling at me."

"Just leave. You have the day off." She went back to her sketches, but her eyes were cold. Karen had no idea what was wrong with her. It was usually easy to read what she was thinking, but her attitude hid everything. She put her hand on her back only to get slapped away.

"Honey, you can talk to me."

"Why? You can't talk to me." She tilted her head back and looked at the sky, as if she were praying for the patience to handle Grace's latest mood.

"I know that you hate me living with you, but I'm looking for an apartment. Just give me some time."

"You're taking my place!" The women stood in the middle of the design studio staring at one another. Karen was completely confused, causing Grace's anger to reach a new level. "Why the hell don't you get it? I'm going through stuff too, but Will isn't there for me anymore! He's too busy making you feel comfortable, or going to lunch with you, or sharing his bed with you! You've got him wrapped around your finger and it makes me sick!"

"Are you kidding me? He's just being a good friend."

"And that's the worst part of all! When he's busy giving you a hug or you're lazing around the apartment eating your own weight in junk food, he stops being a good friend to me! A guy broke into your house like five months ago, get over it! I have bigger problems than your missing jewelry!"

"You are so fucking selfish!"

"And you need to get out of my apartment!"

"Grace…"

"I'm serious. I don't want you there when I get home." They stopped speaking, their eyes locked in a venomous glare. The words stung, even though Grace had no idea what had really happened five months ago. If she did then she would have never acted so harshly. Karen straightened her back and sighed before turning to grab her purse off the floor. She looked back to Grace to find that her face was stiff, uncaring. She turned and walked out the door.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Jackie, unlock your door. I need you." Karen knocked on Jack's apartment door, hoping that he was home. She knew that he had an audition earlier that morning, but he should have been home already. She assumed that the audition didn't go so well because he only locked his door when he was depressed.

"Hi, Karebear." Her assumptions were right because he answered the door with a sad look on his face. His look changed, however, when he noticed the suitcases next to her feet. "Are you alright?"

"No, honey, Grace kicked me out and I need a place to stay."

"She kicked you out?" She nodded and he picked up one of her suitcases. "Well, come in. You can stay here."

"Thanks, Poodle. I really appreciate it." They left her clothes in his room before going back to the living room. She sat on the couch and he began to make some coffee. "How was your audition?"

"Terrible. I fell like twice and they think that gives them the right to say 'get off the stage, homo.'" He sat next to her on the couch and she pouted her bottom lip to him. "I can't believe they couldn't see my talented aura."

"Well, maybe next time. Hey, I know, I'll help you run some lines if you need help."

"That'd be great, Kare." He clapped and bounced, placing his latest failure in the back of his mind. "Wait, why did Grace kick you out?" She shrugged.

"I don't know, honey. She says that I'm taking her place with Will. She started yelling at me and the next thing I know she kicked me out." He patted her hand before standing from the couch to get two cups of coffee. "I guess I can understand what she's saying, but she could have talked to me instead of yelling like that."

"I agree, Kare. Maybe we should talk to Will about it. He is the smartest out of all of us." He handed her a cup and she smirked at his statement. When she thought about it, he was right. Will definitely was the brains of their little group.

"I think I'll let Grace tell him. I don't want her to think that I ran to him with another problem."

"Well, if we aren't going to cause drama, let's go shopping. Oh, and then we can go to the gym and work out until we can fit into the clothes we buy." She nodded and giggled as they went to his room to put their workout clothes in a duffle bag.


	17. Hand in Hand

"How was work?" Will asked when he walked through the door. Grace gave him a half smile while he hung up his coat.

"Not the best, but I'll get over it. How was your day?"

"Great." He hummed a tune as he walked to the kitchen to get a bottle of water.

"Who put the spring in your step?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, you only hum like that when you find pants that make your ass look really good, or when you have sex." He smirked and took a sip of his water. He walked to his room to change his clothes. After a moment or so, Will rushed out of his room, concerned.

"Where are Karen's suitcases?"

"I guess she took them with her." Grace continued to flip through a magazine that she had received in the mail.

"Where did she go?"

"I don't know."

"Okay, why did she go?"

"I kicked her out." Her response was simple, but it released a strange kind of anger in him.

"Why the hell did you do that? She needs us right now."

"No, Will, she needs to get away from us. I am so sick of waking up every morning and eating her crappy bacon. It's like she doesn't have her own life so she has to steal ours."

"Who gives a shit about the bacon? Her mind is not in the right place for her to be on her own!" Grace stood from her seat and glared at him.

"Are you seriously mad at me? It's just Karen!" He stepped closer to her, wondering when she had become so cold.

"What is wrong with you? She has been one of your best friends for like seven years and you just throw her out like that?"

"She's overstaying her welcome."

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Since when did Grace not care about her friends? He shook his head and walked over to his coat to get his phone. He dialed Karen's number and awaited an answer. Grace watched in disbelief as he began to speak to her.

"No, Kare, she didn't mean it. She just doesn't understand."

Grace threw her pencil to the table and grabbed her purse. She was so angry that she couldn't even think straight. She pushed past Will and walked out the door, on her way to find another place to live. She didn't belong with him anymore.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Karen was sitting cross-legged on Jack's bed with his head on her lap. She was running her hands through his hair as he read quizzes out of a teenage magazine. She giggled when she found out, from a quiz, how good of a kisser she was.

"I can't believe teenagers read this stuff. I would much rather find out by experience." Jack laughed and sat up to look at her. He mirrored her position and smiled. "What?"

"Can I play with your hair?" She giggled, for the millionth time that night, and turned around. She took her hair out of its clip and he ran his fingers through her curls. "We should get highlights tomorrow."

"Why, honey, do I need them?"

"Not really, but I do. It'll bring out the flecks of dark blue in my eyes."

"I was thinking about getting a haircut. Maybe we should go, honey." He grabbed her shoulders and leaned to her side, catching her gaze.

"No, don't cut it. Maybe you should just get it straightened. It would look softer."

They continued their talk about hair, girl talk. He was very excited that she was staying with him, even though her feelings had been hurt by Grace. But he knew that she wasn't too worried about their fight. It would soon be resolved. Their arguments always worked themselves out.

"Are you two here?" Will's voice made them jump in surprise. He made his way back to the bedroom to find them together on the bed, surrounded by magazines and nail polish. "I need your help. Grace and I had a fight, and she has been gone for like five hours. I'm worried about her."

"Did you call her parents, honey? Maybe she went to visit." He sat on the edge of the bed and shook his head.

"I called and they said that they haven't seen her. She was really angry with me when she left and she won't answer her cell phone." Jack and Karen both stood from the bed and began to get dressed. It was when Karen pulled her pajama shirt off over her head that Jack gasped. He picked up his discarded shirt and covered her with it.

"Karen, what the hell are you doing? Will is still in the room." She rolled her eyes and put a tee-shirt on.

"Poodle, he's gay too. Just get dressed, we need to find Grace." Will smiled at how Jack was always trying to protect Karen, even if it wasn't exactly necessary. She met Will's eyes and they shared a moment, a reminiscence of the night before. They finished dressing and all three of them hurried out of the building to look for Grace.

Karen tried calling her cell phone, but, unsurprisingly, she received no answer. All three of them even tried text messaging. It was late and they were searching everywhere for her. From smoky bars, to movie theaters, to the twenty-four hour bagel shop that she loved, they couldn't find her. They were worried, for certain, but they couldn't bring themselves to call the police. It seemed too soon for that.

"I'm going to go home and see if she's there." Jack announced when his eyes began to feel heavy. "I'll check the answering machines." He kissed Karen and Will goodbye before he made his way back towards their apartment building. They continued to walk down the sidewalk.

"Honey, do you think it's my fault?"

"She's just angry." He reached down and took her hand in his, intertwining their fingers. She furrowed her brow in confusion and looked at their seemingly innocent connection. He noticed her gaze and met her eyes. He quickly let go of her hand and looked forward, embarrassed. "Sorry."

"She told me that she felt like I was taking her place with you." She took his hand in hers, ignoring his gaze as she did so. They continued to walk hand-in-hand. "Is she right, honey? Am I getting in the way?"

"Of course you're not."

"Oh, honey, look! There she is!" Karen pointed ahead of them and they rushed to Grace, who was stationed at a light. She was waiting for the sign to say 'walk' and didn't notice her two friends rushing to her side.

"Grace, where the hell have you been?" Her head jerked towards Will in disbelief.

"What are you doing here?"

"Honey, we were worried about you." Grace held up her finger in Karen's face.

"I don't want to talk to you." Karen's mouth opened in astonishment, but she remained silent. She knew that they would never get anywhere if she began an argument. She watched as her two friends began to speak, wishing that she could help.

"Will, I'm not a child. You don't have to look after me."

"We were worried. You leave without saying anything, you won't answer your phone, what are we supposed to think?" She gave Will and Karen a look of anger, confusion. She tilted her head towards their hands, still intertwined. They looked to where her gaze landed and quickly separated, putting their hands in their coat pockets.

"What am _I_ supposed to think?"

"What are you talking about?"

"It doesn't matter. I was on my way back to your apartment."

"Our apartment."

"No, Will, yours. I'm packing my things. Leo asked me to take him back and I said yes." Karen couldn't stand her own silence any longer. She couldn't let someone who she cared about so much throw her life away because of her.

"Grace, you can't…"

"Shut the fuck up, Karen." She began to walk away, but Karen forcefully grabbed her arm to pull her back. They were standing face to face and she had a tight grip on Grace, assuring that she couldn't walk away.

"I know that you're angry, honey, but…"

"Get your hands off of me."

"Stop interrupting me!" Her voice was louder than she meant for it to be, but it silenced Grace. Her mind was spinning and she couldn't help, but open her mouth and let her thoughts loose. "I'm sorry that you think you can be so easily replaced. You know how much we all love you and it's ridiculous to think that you can be so selfish when one of your friends needs help."

"You won't even tell me why you need help! How am I supposed to know why you're so crazy when you won't tell me? What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I was raped at gunpoint, Grace. Feel better?" Her gaze was hard and her voice was cold. She released Grace's arm with a shove and turned to walk back to Jack's apartment, her hands deep in her pockets. Will and Grace watched her form hurry down the sidewalk until she was no longer visible.

"So, do you feel better?" Will's whisper took them out of their stupor. She met his eyes, apologetically. Her heart dropped at the sudden confession, and she felt so ashamed of herself. She wanted to hug Karen, apologize for her own behavior. She felt hatred for herself. Will gave her a look of shame before walking after Karen. She stayed frozen to her place on the sidewalk. She couldn't believe how selfish she had been.

----------

Tears were burning her eyes as she quickly walked down the sidewalk towards Jack's apartment. She tried her hardest to stop crying, but it seemed impossible with her confession. She didn't want to tell anyone. She hadn't even said the words aloud, except to Will, and even then it wasn't so direct. People passed by her on the sidewalk and she could feel their eyes on her, pitying her. It made her sick. She hurriedly ducked into an alleyway and leaned her back against a brick building, hiding from the eyes of strangers. She sobbed quietly.

Will hurried after Karen, wondering where she had gone to so quickly. He knew that she would have rather walked back to the apartment than take a cab so he could easily catch up to her. He was almost jogging when she caught his eye. Deep in an alley, Karen was leaned against a wall and crying, her face in her hands. He wouldn't have seen her if he hadn't stopped to catch his breath. He walked down the alley and put his hand on her shoulder. All he received in response was her hand slapping him away.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you." She sniffled and wiped her cheeks.

"What the hell are you doing here? You should be with Grace."

"But I'm more worried about you." He took her face in his hands, wiping the remaining tears from her cheeks. "You told her."

"I know." He leaned forward and pulled her into an embrace, running his hands over her back. She sniffled and laid her cheek against his shoulder. "I just didn't want her to be angry with you."

"She's angry with herself, Kare." He kissed her cheek as they pulled away. Their eyes were locked and she felt a surge of electricity jolt through her stomach. His lips were warm against hers when he bent down and caught her in a gentle kiss. He tried to deepen it, but she quickly pulled away, a shy smile playing on her lips.

"We should go and tell Jack that she's okay, honey." They went home, hand in hand.


	18. Chapter 18

Grace hadn't shown her face in two days. She was too ashamed of herself for the way that she had acted towards Karen. Instead of stumbling through apologies and trying her hardest to show her friend how sorry she really was, she went to live with Leo. They spoke for hours before decided that they could give their marriage another try. It was a hasty decision, but she didn't know where else she belonged, and she was still deeply in love with Leo. She couldn't deny it.

Karen continued to live with Jack, fearing that Grace would come home and not want to see her. She and Jack got along perfectly, anyway. They enjoyed each other's company, and it was fun to have someone to talk to about superficial things. She hadn't laughed, honestly, in so long that it was a breath of fresh air.

"Karen, what are you doing?" Will walked into Jack's apartment one evening when Jack was out on a date. He found Karen lying on Jack's bed, as if she were sulking. She didn't speak, only continued to stare forward. "Karen?" He sat down on the bed and put his hand on her shoulder, running it down to her hip.

"What, honey?" She had been doing a lot of thinking about them, their relationship. She couldn't decide whether or not she wanted to persue anything, or just remain friends.

"Well, I've had the whole day off and you haven't stopped by. I like being with you, you know." She scoffed and pushed his hand from her hip.

"You mean you like being inside of me?"

"What the hell is wrong with you? I would never say something like that." He stood and began to walk away, but she grabbed his hand.

"I'm sorry." She sat up on the bed and met his eyes. "Did you want to do something? Jackie probably won't be back tonight."

"I was thinking we could watch movies and order a pizza." She scrunched up her nose as she stood from the bed. She couldn't remember the last time that she had eaten pizza, it was too fattening.

"Let's get drunk."

----------

"So you've never had a three-way?" He laughed at the fact that Karen, in all of her promiscuity, had never had sex with two people at once.

"Shut up, Mary. So I don't like every opening filled, is that a crime?"

"Not at all." He finished off his glass of red wine and smiled at her. She began to giggle and pushed his shoulder with her hand.

"Why, Wilma, you've done it, haven't you?"

"Only once, but I was drunk."

"Well we're drunk now. Let's call a friend." They laughed until there was a knock on the door. Karen furrowed her brow and stumbled to answer, since she was the closest to the visitor. She turned the doorknob to find a young man with a pizza in his hands. She turned to Will and giggled. "Is this an erotic fantasy, Wilma?" She grabbed her purse off the table and handed him a twenty dollar bill and smiled. "Hey kid, ever done a three-way?"

"Here's your pizza, ma'am." His mumble was lost in his embarrassment as he hurriedly pushed the pizza and her change into her hands. Will burst into laughter, still sitting on the couch, and Karen closed the door and sat the pizza on the table.

"I can't believe you just said that."

"Well, I can't believe you ordered a pizza. Now we're both going to get fat." He opened the box and pulled out a slice. He took a bite into it and walked to the refrigerator to get a couple of beers. She watched as he returned to the couch and sat next to her.

"I'll pay you back the twenty bucks if it's a big deal. Now come on, I don't want to eat alone." She looked at the box and sighed. Jack had told her never to cheat on the diet because she would fall off the wagon. She certainly did not want that.

"That's okay, honey. I'm not very hungry." He rolled his eyes as she sat back further on the couch. He pulled a small piece from his own slice and shoved it in between her lips when she began to speak again. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"You're such a bad liar. You probably haven't eaten anything all day" She picked up a napkin and wiped the mess from her mouth.

"You're an ass." She began to eat. They finished off the whole pizza together, Karen eating at least half. They had spent hours together, talking and drinking. They were having so much fun. They were sitting on the couch with their bare feet resting on the table and their hands intertwined when Will asked a question that had been bothering him.

"Should it be awkward between us?"

"You mean after we had sex?" He smirked at her directness and the fact that he wouldn't have worded the question quite like she had.

"Yes."

"Why, honey? Didn't you like it?" She turned her head and met his eyes, questioningly.

"Of course I liked it. I mostly liked the fact that I'm the only one who can give you an orgasm." She feigned exasperation.

"I can't believe you said that."

"I can't believe we did that." He looked as if he were content, light. It had been a while since he had been drunk and Karen loved how open he was. He was so talkative. She placed her hand on his knee and slowly moved it upward. "Stop."

"I thought you liked being with me." She leaned up and began kissing his neck. He sighed and allowed her to continue for a moment, enjoying the feeling of her lips. She moved, drunkenly, and straddled his lap.

"You're in a dress." She silenced his protests with her mouth against his, her tongue tapping his lips. She pulled away and looked into his deep brown eyes.

"So fuck me in it." She tried to kiss him again, but he turned his head and she only kissed his cheek. "What's wrong, honey?"

"When I'm with you, I don't want it to be just fucking. I don't want to do it drunk. I like making love." His confession was oddly sobering and she felt panic arise within. She wasn't sure that 'making love' was the correct term for screwing one of her friends. She licked her lips and nodded.

"Oh. I'm sorry." She stood from his lap and straightened out her dress. She pecked his lips, chastely before stumbling towards the door.

"Karen, I didn't mean to freak you out."

"It's fine." He stood and began walking after her.

"I still owe you twenty dollars." She held up her hand and gave a small smile.

"No, it's on me. I'll talk to you later." He smiled, another form of apology for scaring her with his words. She returned the gesture before she left for Jack's apartment, unaware that she would pass out as soon as she lay down on the bed.


	19. Chapter 19

_Are you mad at me?_ Her blackberry vibrated next to her as she continued to do sit ups. She opened the text message from Will and sighed.

_Why would I be mad, honey?_

_Because of what I said last night. You know, about making love._

_Will, if you want to talk to me then get over here. I hate text messaging._ She rolled her eyes and dropped her phone on the table before finishing her sit ups. Will walked through the door a few minutes later and stood behind the couch, watching her.

"What do you want, honey?" She asked in between breaths. He watched her stomach flex through her tight shirt and became unable to form words, like a typical man. She looked up at him and rolled her eyes, stopping instantly and remaining seated on the floor. "Will."

"I just wanted to make sure that we were okay."

"Of course we are, honey. Why, do you need to talk about something?" She stood and faced him. "We could go to dinner if you want."

"Would you move back in with me?"

"Isn't that kind of like taking a step backwards, honey?" She walked over to the kitchen and grabbed a beer from the fridge.

"Not necessarily."

"Look, honey, I appreciate it, but if you're only looking for a new Grace then you'd better look further. I'm not going to be anybody's fag hag." She took a long drink of her beer before making eye contact with him. His eyes seemed slightly angry and she knew that she had crossed some sort of line. She knew how much he hated the word 'fag' and she looked to the ground. "I'm sorry, honey."

"I'm not looking for another Grace. I miss having you around." She raised her eyebrow and walked closer to him, her breasts brushing against his chest. She stood on her tiptoes and pressed her lips against his. He immediately responded and placed his hand on her waist. She broke the kiss and looked into his eyes.

"Why is it that when I want you I can't have you, but when you want me I should jump at the offer?"

"What?"

"I wanted you last night and you said no."

"That's different, we were drunk. I'd like to remember what we do." She smiled and stepped away from him.

"The best sex in the world happens when you're either drunk or high." He walked into the kitchen after her as she threw away her bottle and took another one from the fridge. She turned back around to find him standing close to her body, meeting her eyes with his.

"That's a lie. I thought it was really good the other night." He wrapped his arms around her waist, resting his hands on her buttocks.

"Since when are we a couple, honey?" She pecked his lips and stepped out of his embrace. "I don't remember you becoming straight."

"What if I promise that you could take advantage of me whenever you wanted? Would you move back in then?"

"That's tempting, but why don't we talk about it over dinner?"

"Really?" She shrugged and took a sip of her beer.

"Yeah, honey. You still owe me for pizza."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

He collapsed on top of her sweaty body and sighed satisfactorily into her mouth. Their chests were rising and falling together as their tongues battled. She pulled him close with her legs and he ran his fingers through her hair. She broke the kiss and leaned her head back onto the bed, sighing.

"Oh, honey." Her whisper was followed by a small giggle. He regained his strength and leaned up on his elbows to look into her eyes, never breaking their connection. She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"You are so beautiful." He leaned down and kissed her lips once more before she loosened her legs and allowed him to pull out. He flopped down next to her on his back and took her hand in his. "Are you okay?"

"Yes." She continued to stare at the ceiling, wondering when they had taken the turn in their relationship. It was like only yesterday they were at each other's throats. If she had to think of it, they were at each other's throats the day before. That's what they did. Who knew that the source of their bickering was sexual frustration? She laughed at her own thoughts and he turned his face to find her eyes.

"What's funny?"

"You and me." She rolled over to lie on top of him, straddling his waist. Her face went from an amused expression to one of complete seriousness. She pecked his lips. "Honey, I don't know that I've ever said thank you for everything you've done for me. But I really appreciate it all."

"You're one of my best friends, Karen. And, apparently, now your lover."

"Should we be doing this, honey?"

"Probably not, but I'm not sure I could go my whole life without having sex like that again." She laughed and deeply kissed his lips.

"I agree." She stood from the bed and began to dress. He watched as she quickly covered her naked body and wondered what was going on in her mind.

"Karen, are you okay when you're with me? I mean, after what happened to you…"

"Honey, it's almost been seven months. I'm doing really well." She buttoned her pants and turned around to fully face him.

"Do you still think about him?" She bit her lip and looked away, unable to maintain eye contact. He took her hand in his and pulled her to sit down on the bed, giving her the strength to answer.

"I think about it every day. It hits me at weak moments. But now I'm on some antidepressants so I'm feeling much better." She tried to make a small joke to end the conversation and stood to make her exit. He pulled her back to him as he sat up. He kissed her lips and pushed some of her hair behind her ear.

"I didn't know you went to the doctor for it."

"I didn't go to a therapist or anything. I called Pharmacist and he got me a prescription."

"That's illegal." His words were useless. They both knew that some of her activities were far from being law-abiding.

"It's just hard to get out of bed sometimes."

"I still want to help you, in a healthy way. Would you move back in with me?" She smiled and patted his face with her hand.

"Honey, I thought that was established tonight when I put my hand in your pants." She walked towards his bedroom door before turning to face him once again. "I'm going to get my suitcases."


	20. Chapter 20

"Karebear, you are going to freak out." She looked into his blue eyes as her hair dresser finished drying her hair.

"Why, honey? Is it bad?"

"No. It looks really good." She bit her lip and waited for the woman to run the comb through her hair one last time. The chair was turned around and she finally caught a glimpse of her reflection in the mirror.

"Wow." She tilted her head to the side and ran her fingers through her hair. She had gotten in straightened and highlighted, as per Jack's request. It made her look younger and softer. She had never realized how long her hair had grown since it was so curly, but it was almost to her mid-back when it was straight.

"I love it, Kare."

----------

"What did you do to your hair?" Will looked up from his chair by the table. He had just gotten home from work and sat down to read the paper when Karen returned from her appointment.

"I got it straightened. Do you like it, honey?" She walked over to him and ran a hand through her new style.

"You look so different." She made an innocent face before smiling and leaning down to peck his lips. "So what did you do today, besides changing your identity?" She giggled and sat next to him at the table.

"Jackie and I went shopping and got our nails done. I got you a sweater." She walked over to the door where her shopping bags were laying and ruffled through a bag for his item. He smiled at her happiness and watched her. "What did you do, honey?"

"Oh, work. I tried to get a hold of Grace, but she didn't answer her phone. I left her birthday cards from us on the door of her office, but I don't know."

"Honey, it's been forever. Maybe we should just go to her apartment and try to talk to her." She sat Will's new shirt on the table in front of him and poured herself a glass of red wine. "If she tries to run away, we'll follow her."

"Maybe ambushing her isn't the way to go. I like this color." He held the shirt up to his chest. She sat down next to him and smiled.

"It brings out your eyes." She leaned forward and pressed her lips to his, gently. He smiled into her kiss and she placed her hand on his cheek. Jack suddenly burst through the door, but stopped walking when he saw them jump apart.

"Were you kissing?" He cringed and tilted his head to the side in question. Karen was quick to cover and stood to top off her half empty glass of wine.

"We were just messing around, Poodle. I needed a kiss."

"You could have asked me." He flounced over to her and placed his head on her shoulder.

"Well, honey, I didn't know you were coming over. Did you need something?"

"I just wanted to see if one of you called Grace today." He took a bottle of water from the fridge and sat down in the chair that Karen was previously occupying. Will gave him a questioning look.

"You can remember Grace's birthday, but you can't remember to go to work in the mornings." Jack sputtered and began to walk out the door when the phone rang. Karen answered and he stopped walking when he heard who it was.

"Gracie?"


	21. Chapter 21

Grace had only called to thank them for their birthday cards. After a brief apology to Karen, she hung up and wouldn't answer her phone when she was called back. The three friends who remained in the apartment barely spoke of the conversation. More than a month had passed and they were still estranged from Grace. The future of her friendships looked bleak.

Will and Karen had continued their sort of relationship. She slept in his bed every night and they often made love. But Karen became bored with just 'making love.' She had always been such a sexual person and Will was just too gentle. He always referred to it as making love and it always happened in his bed, they couldn't be drunk, and it was always in missionary position. She was satisfied, but she felt like they could be more explorative. She wanted to just be fucked, for lack of better words.

One night Karen decided that she should address the issue of his ways. She had just finished brushing her teeth when she walked into his bedroom, balancing a small, square object in her hands. She was clad in one of his long tee-shirts and the carpet felt soft against her bare feet. Will looked at her from the bed, where he was reading a novel, and gave her a confused look.

"What's that, Kare?" She slowly straddled him and held it in front of his face. He looked at his reflection before his eyes widened and met hers.

"Cocaine."

"Get that away from me." He tried to push her away, but she stayed firm. She wanted to at least be heard.

"You're a prude, Will." He stopped his struggle and sighed. "I know you don't mean to be, and the sex is great…"

"What are you talking about?"

"I need it to be rough sometimes, honey. You're too gentle, and I want some spontaneity."

"You're talking about our sex lives? You actually want me to hurt you? That's insane."

"Not hurt me, I just need you to be a man about it."

"Fuck you."

"Please!" She leaned her head back and sighed in exasperation. "I love being with you, honey, but it can't be mushy and sweet all the time. That kind of stuff has to just happen by itself. Besides, we aren't an old married couple. We're screwing around. It should be less structured." He felt bad for what she was feeling. He wasn't aware that he was so controlling when it came to their relationship, and he understood from where she was coming. He just didn't know where they had to draw the line. Would she feel like he was forcing her? That was his biggest concern, making her feel uncomfortable.

"Karen, after what you've been through, I don't think I can just…"

"You're worried about me, still?" Her heart felt heavy. She couldn't believe that after all that time he was still scared to bring back her memories. "Honey, I'm fine. And if something is wrong then I'll tell you. I promise. But you have to do one thing for me."

"You know I'd do anything for you." She nodded and gave him a soft smile before presenting him the mirror. He took it in his hands, and she held up a small tube.

"I want you to have coked out sex with me."

"No. This stuff can kill you." Her eyes met his and they remained locked to their positions. She gave him a stern look and he held the mirror still as she leaned down and a line disappeared through her nose. He watched, knowing how bad it was for her, but he let her go. He knew that she was sick of being so protected and he decided, against his better judgment, to allow her to continue. She wasn't his, by any means. She did another line and sniffled before handing him the tube. "I'm not doing it."

"Do it once, honey. Please, for me. I'll never ask again." She took the mirror in her hands and he took the tube in his. He had to admit that he was oddly tempted. He suspiciously eyed the last line on the mirror until she spoke. "But if you really don't want to then I understand." She wanted him to know that she wasn't exactly trying to pressure him. He took a deep breath, thinking. He trusted her, but they were treading on shaky ground. He did not want to be her drug-buddy, but if she was as unsatisfied as she said she was, shouldn't he try to help? He didn't want to give in, though. Drugs were a big deal in his mind, and he had only smoked pot a few times in his early twenties. No, he made a decision. He was going to satisfy her, she deserved it for all she had been through. She deserved it at least one time from him, and he was willing to provide.

"Once." He slowly leaned forward and the mirror was soon empty. She sat it on the bedside table and took a deep breath. She turned the light off and looked into his eyes, the moon providing a ray of light through the window. "What do you want me to do now? I don't feel any different."

"Just wait a second." She leaned forward and kissed his lips. At the same moment, he began feeling strange. He leaned his forehead against hers and took a deep breath. He felt lightheaded and slightly dizzy.

"Karen, I feel really weird. Is it supposed to make me feel this weird?" He began to squirm beneath her, but she placed her hands on each side of his face.

"You can't let yourself panic or this trip will suck for both of us. Just kiss me, honey." He complied and pressed his lips to hers. When her tongue penetrated his lips he felt a surge of electricity and all fears were forgotten. She began to move her hips as he wrapped his arms around her, causing his body to respond quickly.

He lifted her shirt over her head to find that she was completely naked underneath. She took his shirt from his body as well and ran her hands over his chest. His erection began to press harder into her thigh and she sighed when he captured her lips again. He bit her lip in passion and rushed to pull the blanket out from in between them.

She kissed his neck and made her way down his chest. His back was still pressed against the headboard of his bed as Karen kissed down his stomach. He lifted his hips as she slid her hands beneath the waistband of his boxers and pulled them from his body.

Foreplay wasn't necessary. The drug had overtaken their minds and both of them were immensely turned on. She moved to straddle him once again and he quickly shoved into her body. She whimpered as he began to lift her by her hips. Their connection was overly strong. She moved on top of him, using the headboard as leverage as their tongues battled. His fingers dug into the flesh of her hips. It was as if they were taken to another world, where they were floating high above the ground. Everything seemed to move at an odd pace, and he smiled into her neck. She pulled back and found his lips in a sensual kiss.

"Oh." She felt a rush of warmth unexpectedly surge through her stomach. It was quicker than ever and she bit his lip pleasure. He felt her walls tighten and continued to move beneath her, overly aroused by the fact that she was so quick to find the edge of her feelings. She was breathing very heavily as they continued to move.

She hurriedly pulled away from him and lifted herself from their link to one another. She turned around and got on her hands and knees, looking back to find him following her. He pushed into her center again and they began to meet each other's movements. She felt her body jerk forward and inwardly smiled to herself at the feeling. He was finally willing to overpower her, and she loved it.

He ran his hands over her hips and around her stomach as he sped up his pace. A small moan escaped his lips and he leaned closer to her back. His hands massaged her breasts and he kissed every inch of skin that he could. Their sighs were echoing throughout the darkened bedroom while the moon shone through the window. Her hands clutched the sheets beneath her, her knuckles were white. He sped up his pace again and reached down to their connection to brush his fingers over her.

She gasped as her second orgasm rushed throughout her entire body, sending warmth from her fingers to her toes. He was soon to follow and they continued to move as the passion flooded their souls. Once he finally did stop he didn't move from her. Their breathing was heavy and she could see stars in the corners of her eyes. She licked her lips and tried to calm herself.

He pulled out and flopped down on the bed, her following. They were still trying to catch their breath and he pulled her close to him. He leaned down and kissed her hard on the lips.

"Karen…wow." She giggled and ran her hand over his chest.

"Oh, honey, that was the best." She rolled over on top of him and looked down into his eyes. She kissed his lips and laid her head on his chest. She noted that it was the first time that they had been together that he didn't ask her if she was okay after they were finished. She smiled, knowing that he was worrying less and less about hurting her. It was flattering that he cared so much about her, but there was a point where she had to take the lead, and she was so glad she did. But she made a deal with herself that she would never use drugs in their relationship again. It may have been a wonderful feeling, but she liked it best when nothing but two souls were involved. She liked it best when it was just him, inside her, holding her close. They fell asleep in one another's arms, blissfully.


	22. Chapter 22

"Hello?" Karen answered her cell phone while eating some cherries in Will's kitchen. He had just left for work and she was still in her pajamas, alone and happy. There was no response to her answering the phone so she shrugged and placed it back on the counter. As soon as she took another cherry in between her lips, the phone rang again. She rolled her eyes and answered. "Hello?" She, once again, received no response. She hung up and decided that she wouldn't answer it if it rang again.

"Hey, Karebear, you want to go shopping?" Jack walked through the door and jumped on the couch, sitting with his legs underneath him. "I feel like a new pair of shoes."

"I just want to laze around today, honey. We could watch movies." She walked over to him and put a cherry into his mouth.

"You would rather watch movies than go out and buy things? Are you sick?" He held his hand to her forehead, causing her to giggle before sitting next to him on the couch.

"No, I'm not sick. I just don't feel like going out today." Her phone rang once again and she rolled her eyes.

"Aren't you going to answer that?"

"No. Someone keeps calling and then I answer and they won't speak. I'm just ignoring it, honey." She opened a bottle of water and took a small sip before rummaging through her bowl of cherries. Her phone beeped, indicating that there was a voice message. Jack walked into the kitchen and got some water from the fridge.

"Do you want me to see who it was?"

"Yeah, just push the speakerphone." He dialed her number and pushed the speakerphone button, waiting for a voice. She assumed it was Grace, not wanting to actually speak to her, but to make sure that she was okay through voice mail. But her heart turned to ice when she heard who it was.

"_Hello Karen. You look so sexy with your new hairstyle. You know, I miss being inside of you. You're screams when we were together that night, still rock my world…"_

His profane speech continued until she hurried to shut off the phone, which was still in Jack's hands. His eyes were wide, and he could feel how cold Karen's hands were when she snatched the phone from him, pressing the 'off' button. She was shaking, completely horrified, and their eyes met.

"That wasn't a former lover, was it?" His voice was taking a matter-of-fact tone and she knew that she had to tell him, but she really didn't want him to know. He had always held her up on a pedestal, and she didn't want him to ever think any less of her.

"Let's go shopping, honey. You look like you need a new pair of shoes." She smiled and tried to walk away, but he grabbed her hand, maybe too roughly. He pulled her close to him and met her eyes. "Please, don't."

"What happened with that guy?" She bit her bottom lip and looked away. It didn't feel like the right time to tell him. She wanted to wait until it felt right, when they were sharing secrets.

"Jack, can we talk about this later?"

"I don't think so." He walked her over to the couch and pulled her onto his lap. She wrapped her arm around his neck and intertwined the fingers of her other hand with his. She was so nervous that it was difficult to catch a deep breath. "I understand if it's hard, Kare. But, please. Did he hurt you?"

"Promise not to think any less of me." He placed his hand under her chin and brought her eyes to meet his.

"I promise I never could because I love you, Karebear." She gave him a soft smile and he pecked her lips, hoping to bring her some comfort. She finally took a deep breath and began to speak.

"Well, the night that I came to live here, I was getting ready for bed and I heard a noise downstairs…"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Will walked into his apartment to find Jack and Karen on the couch, sleeping. Karen was in between Jack and the back of the couch and he was holding her close, protectively. It was often that he came home to find them like that so he didn't think too much about it. But at a second glance, they looked different. It was as if there was something attaching them together, a mental connection.

Her phone rang and he reached down to answer it, not wanting the sound to wake the sleeping friends. Karen stirred, but cuddled closer to Jack before her sleep deepened. Will rushed into the bathroom and answered the phone. He heard nothing on the other end of the line so he hung up and shrugged. It rang again, instantaneously, and he hurriedly answered. Finally, the person on the other end of the line spoke, in a voice that sounded oddly familiar to him.

"You must be Will. May I speak with Karen?"

"She can't come to the phone right now. I'd be glad to take a message."

"I would really like to speak with her. Could you wake her up?" Will's heart jumped a bit.

"I never said she was asleep."

"But she is, isn't she?"

"Who the hell is this?"

"Just give the phone to Karen."

"I don't think so, buddy. Stop calling." He pressed the 'end' button on the phone and sighed. Suddenly, Jack was in view.

"He's been calling her all day." Their eyes met in a moment of understanding. Jack shrugged and leaned against the doorframe. "She told me earlier."

"Has she spoken to him?"

"No. She only listened to the voice message."

They continued their conversation as Karen slept soundly on the couch. She rarely ever slept peacefully so they decided to allow it. When she finally did awaken, she could smell the warm meal that Will was cooking. She heard her blackberry ring in the distance, but didn't move to answer it. She knew who it was and she wasn't willing to deal with him. However, she was unprepared for Will to answer the phone, cursing at the man on the other end, telling him to stop calling and leave her alone. She opened her eyes and looked into the kitchen, where Will had just turned off the phone.

"Honey, was that him again?" She sat up and rubbed her eyes, her contacts were foggy from sleeping in them.

"Yes, but you have no reason to worry." She stood and walked over to him, standing behind him as he stirred some vegetables on the stove. She wrapped her arms around his waist and laid her head on his back, breathing in his scent. He had changed into a tee shirt when he got home and she could feel his warm skin beneath the thin fabric. Her fingers tickled his stomach as she drew shapes with her fingernails.

"You should have woken me up, honey. Now I won't get any sleep tonight." She slipped her hands beneath the bottom of his shirt to caress the skin of his stomach. "We'll have to find some way to make me sleepy again."

"You don't want to eat first? I'm making something I found in the Oprah magazine." She giggled and moved to slide his arm around her. She pressed her lips to his and kissed him, sensually running her tongue over his bottom lip. She pushed her knee in between his legs to caress his thighs before breaking the kiss.

"How was your day, honey?" She pressed her pelvis into his and smiled.

"It was really good. I'm up for partner."

"What? Oh, honey, that's wonderful." She kissed him again, running her hand over his cheek. Her cell phone began to ring again and she pulled away from their kiss with a sigh.

"How are you?" His eyes dug deep into hers and she shrugged.

"Didn't you say I have no reason to worry? I'm fine, honey." But no matter how convincing she thought she was, Will couldn't believe her so easily.


	23. Chapter 23

Karen knocked on the door of Grace's apartment, hoping that she was home. They hadn't spoken in a very long time and she was ready to mend their friendship. She loved Will and Jack, but she needed her Gracie back. There was no answer so she knocked again, harder than before. The do swung open within a moment and she jumped at the sudden motion. Grace stood before her in a pair of pajamas, her eyes widened.

"Hi, honey."

"Karen, what are you doing here?" She smiled, nervously, before shrugging.

"I guess I just missed you. How are things? How's Leo?"

"He's working the night shift tonight. We're fine." They stared at each other for a moment before Grace rushed forward and enveloped Karen in a tight hug. "I'm so sorry, Karen. If I would have known then I never would have treated you that way. I hate myself for it. I'm sorry."

"Oh, honey, no." Grace cried on her shoulder and their embrace strengthened. "How could I have expected you to know? I don't blame you."

"You don't know how sorry I am." Karen pulled away from the hug and held her by the shoulders. "Please forgive me."

"I do, Gracie. I just want our friendship back. I want to come back to work."

"You want to come in?"

"I'd like that." Her hand was taken and Karen was led into Grace's apartment. She ended up spending the night.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Karen walked down the sidewalk in front of the coffee shop that she had visited with Grace. Their friendship seemed to pick up where it had left off and their problems were forgotten, painted over. She was so glad that none of her friends judged her and they were all extremely supportive of her inner struggle. They didn't treat her any differently than before, only with a deeper understanding.

She walked into the building where Will worked and stepped into the elevator. It wasn't often that she visited him at work, but she wanted to surprise him. He was up for making partner of the firm and she wanted to make sure that everyone was treating him nicely. At least that was the story she told herself. The truth was she was dying to see him. Even though they lived together and she had only seen him five hours before, she wanted to look at him. She wanted to take his hand in hers and look into his eyes.

She knocked on the door of his office before opening it. She smiled brightly when she saw his face, looking up at her. He looked exhausted and his eyes were red. She stepped into the office and closed the door behind her before walking over to him and sitting on the edge of his desk.

"Honey, you look…rough. What's going on?"

"I came in this morning and they threw a ton of work at me. Apparently, the way to make partner is to kiss ass. It took me four and a half hours to finish all of that." He ran a hand through his hair before meeting her sympathetic eyes. "What are you doing here? I thought you were going back to work today."

"Well, Grace and I had lunch and she said I could have the rest of the day off. Plus, I wanted to see you." He smiled and placed a hand on her thigh. She returned the smile.

"Kiss me." She leaned down and pressed her lips against his. He slid his hand higher up her thigh as he deepened the kiss. She sighed when his hand disappeared in between her legs. She pushed her tongue into his mouth and caressed his face with her hand.

"This is not the way to make partner." They jumped apart as one of Will's colleagues spoke. They hadn't heard him enter the room, as distracted as they were. "Besides, I thought you were gay."

"I am." Karen smiled to herself and looked to the floor. What she felt with him was certainly never gay. She couldn't look at the other man without smiling so she continued to stare at the floor.

"Hey, Ted, get in here." The colleague called out to another lawyer at the firm. He obviously wanted to share the scene with a friend, someone whom Will was barely familiar with.

"Stop that."

"She's your client right?" She still couldn't look up, not even to defend him. Suddenly, another man walked into the room and stood in front of Will. He was told the story and began to laugh as well. But Karen knew the voice. Her gaze snapped from the ground to the face of the second man, Ted. It was him. His grey eyes, the hair, the face. She felt lightheaded, and her knees began to buckle. He gave her a sickening glare before he and the other man left.

"They are such asses. Now where were we?" He leaned down to kiss her again, but she quickly pushed him away.

"Stop it."

"What's wrong?"

"How do you know that guy?"

"He works in the filing room. Why, what's wrong?"

"That was him." He gave her a look of confusion and she licked her lips. "Honey, that Ted guy was _him_."

"What about him?" He was still clearly confused. He had known Ted for a year or so and he still knew nothing about him. Was there something special that he should know about?

"That's the guy who raped me." Her voice was soft and fearful. She couldn't believe that she had been standing in the same room with him, again. All of her old fears had resurfaced and she desperately needed a drink.

"Oh my gosh. Are you sure?" She rolled her eyes and scrunched her nose in anger.

"Honey, do you think I wouldn't know?" His thoughts were scattered all over his mind. He took her in his arms and held her close. "I need to get out of here." She tried to walk away, but he wouldn't let her get very far before he grabbed her hand.

"You're not going anywhere by yourself. I'll pack my briefcase and I'll go home with you." She nodded as he walked behind his desk to perform his task. Meanwhile, she looked out the window of his office to find Ted, staring at her. She cringed as he winked and raised his eyebrows before walking away. She wanted to cry. So many emotions were slapping her from all different directions that she didn't know what to do.

"Are you ready?" She jumped as Will's hand enveloped hers. She nodded and he turned off the lights of his office before they walked to the elevator.


	24. Chapter 24

The first time he saw her he wanted her, it was that simple. She had been wearing a knee-length, tight skirt and her body was flawless. It started out as an innocent feeling, a crush, but as the months progressed it turned into obsession. She was the definition of what a woman should look like, and he found her captivating. Soon he was reading her files at the office, finding out where she lived. He would follow her, but he wanted more. He wanted to talk to her, touch her, and it was clear that she didn't even notice him, wouldn't give him the time of day. But she was just so beautiful, so captivating, that one night, when he was watching her walk into her manse, he snapped.

----------

Will had left Jack with Karen while he went back to the firm. He was glad that she was asleep when he left because he didn't want her to know where he was going. The elevator doors opened and he stormed through the doors down towards Ted's office. He burst through the door to find him hanging up the phone.

"Mr. Truman, how can I help you?"

"Why her?" The man feigned confusion.

"Why who?"

"Why Karen? You raped her." The man smiled and stood to meet Will's gaze.

"You've been with her, you must know. It wasn't hard to find things out about her. You'd go into your office with her, I'd hear her speak, and then you'd walk out and hand me her file. I watched her every move before I decided that I needed to fuck her, so I did."

Will's fist collided with the man's face before a conversation could be carried any further, he couldn't hear any more of it. Ted fell to the ground, shocked by the sudden impact of Will's fist. Will hurriedly bent over the man and hit him again, repeatedly. He wanted to kill him for what he had done. He wanted to make him feel what Karen had been feeling ever since that haunted night in her manse.

----------

Karen's cell phone rang at seven o'clock in the evening. She had been sleeping on the couch while Jack watched television, and the sudden ring frightened her. She reached for the phone and sleepily answered it.

----------

Her expensive heels were loud against the floor of the police station as she walked to the front desk. She spoke to a couple of officers and was immediately led down a long hallway to the holding cells. She was soon standing in front of a cell, looking down at her lover.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Her voice was cold, even though she hadn't meant for it to sound so harsh. He looked at her and stood from his wooden bench to stand in front of her.

"Just bail me out."

"I can't do that. You have to have your hearing."

"But you _can_ do that 'Karen Walker' thing where people will listen to you. Get me out of here."

"You beat the shit out of some guy and you expect me to just bail you out? We sound like some white-trash couple."

"Karen, bail me out."

"You should have left it alone."

"He raped you."

"I know." The venom was dripping from their voices and there was a sudden movement from the other cell, located down the hall. She turned to look into the eyes of someone who she couldn't even consider a man. He was staring at her. She turned back to Will and gave him a questioning look. "Why is he here?"

"I told the police about it. They arrested him and all they need is for you to identify him."

"How dare you. I expected you to keep my secret and you shout it out to every person who asks." Her stomach hurt and she felt light headed. She couldn't believe what he had done.

"No, Kare, I gave them a motive for my lapse in judgment. But you can get him put away if you only tell them that he was the one."

"You're a fucking liar." Her eyes were filled with tears, but she held them back. Her voice quieted and she stepped closer to him. "Honey, this is how it would happen. I would tell, we would go to court, this would be spread all over my social circle, and in the end he wouldn't get convicted. Then he would find me and do it again. I can't take that chance."

"If you don't tell, he will get out. He already found you, Karen. Take the opportunity to put him away so you can get on with your life. If you do nothing, he will have every opportunity to do it again." She blinked and a tear fell down her cheek. She had the upper hand in the situation, but what if it did no good? She hated to recognize that Will was right. She looked at the man down the hall, his sickening eyes watching her every move. It was disgusting. She hated him. She had to do something. She took a deep breath and kissed him in between the bars. Then, she turned to find a police officer. She made her statement and that was it, so simple. It was the beginning of something that she had never wanted to initiate.


	25. Chapter 25

Days of gathering evidence, her security tapes from the manse, the results of her rape kit, witnesses from the hospital, everything seemed like it was in Karen's favor. She hadn't given any description of her attacker when she went to the hospital, so the police had no leads, they could pursue nothing. All they had was the rape kit, until she offered them a match for the excrement they found inside of her. Will was sentenced with some hours of community service and a fine for his violence towards Ted, but he took it in stride and continued to work on Karen's case. The two hadn't made love since he was arrested. She was angry with him for making her tell her secret, but she also felt betrayed. It was unbelievable to her that he told, after he promised he never would.

"Honey, what are you doing?" Karen asked as Will lay on top of her. She was resting on the couch, staring at the ceiling after a long day of working on her case. The court date had been set and they were hurrying to find all the evidence and arguments they could. It was exhausting.

"I think you know." He whispered into her neck before trailing kisses down to her collarbone. She closed her eyes and licked her lips before trying to push him away. He wouldn't allow her to move from beneath him. "Are you still angry with me?"

"Of course I am." Her words were quickly spat in his face and it took him aback.

"I wasn't betraying your trust, if that's what you think."

"You know that's what I think."

"I'm protecting you. Who knows what else he is capable of? But if we get him off the streets, there's no telling how many women you're saving. You may not be the only one." She hated the way that he always seemed to bring a sense of logic to their conversation. It was annoying, but it also made her think. Maybe he was right, but doubts were still flooding her mind.

"What if we lose the case, honey?" Her whisper was shy and he pecked her lips in a form of comfort. "What happens if he gets out?"

"If he ever lays a finger on you again, I will kill him. He is never going to hurt you when I'm around." She took a deep breath and couldn't help, but smile at his words. "Now, can I kiss you?"

She nodded in response and he took her breath away with a deep kiss. His tongue was quick to penetrate her lips and she wrapped her arms around his neck. He moved and she spread her legs, bending them at the knees on each side of his body. The kiss was soft and sensual, yet deep and full of energy that made their heart rates race. She sighed as his hand slid up her bare thigh and underneath the fabric of her dress, caressing the line of her thong.

"Honey, not here." Her voice was strained and followed by a sigh as his lips trailed down her neck and met her cleavage.

"Who's going to know?" He unbuttoned the top of her dress and licked the skin between her breasts, sending a chill throughout her spine. She slightly arched her back as he kissed his way down the front of her body. His fingers played with the thin fabric of her panties while his other hand slowly unbuttoned the front of her dress.

The dress was fully opened when he made his way back up her body and kissed her full on the mouth. She lifted his shirt from his body, desperate to feel his skin against hers. She unbuckled his belt and pushed his pants and boxers down as far as necessary. She awaited his removal of her thong, but gasped when he ripped it from her body with a swift pull.

"Ouch, Will!"Her voice was breathless and anxious. He shut her up with a kiss and guided himself into her body. They sighed at the connection and deeply kissed, before slowly beginning to move.

Moments later they were gasping for air on the couch, her legs wrapped tightly around his waist. The lovers were so consumed in their passion that they didn't notice the opening of the door or the two figures witnessing the scene. It was when Will moved his head to the other side of Karen's face, sucking on her neck, that she got a clear view of the door. She gasped and tried to push him away from her.

"Am I hurting you?" He panicked and stopped moving.

"No, damn it, get off of me, honey." He followed her gaze and looked to the door, his face turning pale. She continued to try to push him away from her and he finally pulled out. They rushed to cover themselves, overwhelmingly embarrassed. He pulled his pants up and stood from the couch.

"What the hell are you doing here?"


	26. Chapter 26

They spent some time explaining themselves to George and Marilyn, so embarrassed. It was one thing to have someone walk in on a pair of lovers, but it was different when it was one of the lovers' parents. It didn't take long for Will to apologize for what had been witnessed, but, oddly enough, nobody seemed to mind. It was as if they were expecting it, somehow relieved.

A long conversation was had and their visit ended, leaving Will and Karen to finally look each other in the eyes. Her hair was messy and the buttons of her dress were wrong. He smiled at her disheveled state, knowing that he probably looked similar. She bit her lip and ran a hand through her hair, still sitting at the dining table.

"What are you smiling at, honey?"

"My parents just walked in on us fucking on my couch." He began to laugh and walked behind her to massage her shoulders. She gave a small laugh leaned her head forward so his hands could continue.

"Since when do we fuck? I thought it was 'making love.'" Her words were mocking and he had to chuckle at the fact that she didn't seem very embarrassed.

"That was not how I make love." He leaned down and began to kiss her neck. "We can go back to where we left off." She giggled and pulled away, standing to face him.

"I know your mind is always going, honey, but maybe later." She moved to pick up her ruined panties from the floor and throw them away in the kitchen. "You owe me new underwear."

"What are you thinking about?" His question was unexpected and it took her a moment to put her thoughts into words.

"I'm wondering what we're doing." She took a deep breath and met his gaze, almost in an intimidating fashion. "I mean, how do you really feel about me? Are you just a good friend to me because I put out?"

"You know I don't think that way." She threw her hands in the air and gave an odd sigh, slightly smiling.

"No I don't, Will. Half the time I have no idea what you're thinking, or how you feel. Damn it, just tell me how you feel about me."

"I love you." If she were a young girl she would have nervously laughed, confused by the statement. But she wasn't a girl anymore, she was a grown woman, and she was still confused. It was Will, her gay lawyer and best friend. How could he possibly love her? She licked her lips and shook her head, unable to properly grasp the situation.

"You're lying." She tried to walk away, but he pulled her to him and kissed her hard on the mouth. He wrapped his arms around her waist and didn't pull away until they felt her tears mixing with their connected lips.

"I would never lie to you, Karen. I love you. I want to be with you forever."

It was then that she knew that he was telling her the truth, being honest with her. She smiled and he wiped the tears from her cheeks with his thumbs. They weren't sure what the future held for them, whether they could last as a couple or they could only exist as lovers. They didn't know if the case against Ted would work out in their favor. They didn't know how Jack and Grace would take the news that their friends were in love, but they knew one thing: love existed. Love was real and they had the opportunity to hold it in their arms as friends, lovers, soul mates. Life continued, uncertain as usual, but definitely without any more secrets. Even though everything began for them with just that: a secret.

"I love you too, honey."

The End


End file.
